So… when removing all emotions and thoughts … facts only – no biased one way or the other…

I start off running … because I have just fact facts facts … they stand alone!! I don’t even have to attach any feelings, emotions or biased… it will blow you away. Your jaw would drop

Bleh see??? See what happens …

I start off talking about facts and then it snowballs into ?? I dunno emotion??? Dramatics? Because of the way I feel…

Ok so removing that 😮 hard AF! I have to be stone solid facts only! And done. 😮 whoa

That’s hard – I am shaving off a section of myself ahhh!!! I just have to “keep being aware” I am doing that!!!!

Whew!! Do not run away with emotions!!! Be aware! No biased I don’t care – none of that!!!

Whoa! It sounds easy… like I can say “yeah I can do that, no problem”

And I start out with excited intentions…

Starts off great… and then the flare comes in and it gets dramatized by the emotions cause they lead bleh!!!! And I get biased because of that…

Ok so no personal thought… remove that!!! No biased. I can not go either way.

Ok… I just have to rethink how I handle…

Well … I’m gonna command that floor when I have my turn to speak – I am going to try to just be strong and look at it like that… like the police PR … ok that part I think I got…

I will OCD all files and lay out facts only. And period done. Best I can… doing that too.

I just have to remove the emotions and biased… so ok… I’m going to have to maybe kinda remove myself? I have to!!! I think that’s my key 🔑??

If I was this woman’s lawyer, how would I present this if was some other woman like me?

So I will try to remove emotion and biased by looking at it like it’s not me, I just get to play lawyer lol … the role of my lifetime lol oh my god!

On tv they make it look all cool collected and dramatic lol … this is not tv… and it’s not like that… but maybe I can kinda somehow remove my own self while looking at this??

I will be doing a performance lol … so that’s a way to look at it I suppose?

It’s a role I have to take … whoa 😮 yes… because it’s totally not one bit who I am… I have to not be that and not let that enter!!

Straight, no opinions, no emotions, no feelings, nothing!! Keep that away!!! So yeah, I have to switch my mind set 😮 because I want this seamless. And I want to do the best I can and feel good with that.

He can be dirty or whatever else – he does that to take me down… he is vengeful – hard. He gets pleasure from it – not joking. Wish I was.

I don’t want to fear that anymore – so I’m about to rise above him ❤️✌️ and whatever happens – ya know… I tried the way I wanted and was true to myself … so what is meant to be, will be

But … I might actually do this ❤️ oh wow 😮 whoa 😮 🙏🙏🙏🙏

www.youtube.com/watch

It was obviously Friday ❤️ boys came over … we had dinner…

First we played… a “choose your own adventure” game… it actually one or more players. It’s dumb… just buy the books – you won’t have pieces. Everyone was mad you could just easily get a 📖 book. But eh was alright ish.

And then we played “the mind” lol … that was funny!! We could get to round 4 ….I think ?? … you all work together to get past the round… you have to win together… it’s the perfect game!!! No one person wins, you have to come together and guess correctly – if one gets it wrong, everyone loses. Was pretty cool!! I liked it. Win or lose together ❤️

Then we played on the switch… something like 51 clubhouse games… it’s just tons of games. It was cool. I like Yahtzee 🎲.. that ones my favorite – I also liked the golf 🏌️

Time went fast… we had fun

I kinda really liked “the mind” … it was cool! Pretty funny. We laughed a lot with that game ❤️❤️❤️

I love Fridays and being with them ❤️

Anyway. I said nothing about anything – cause that is not happening 😮

Definitely not right now.

I am not ready to handle all kinds of emotions coming at me right now… I do need to get through stuff first

Focus. So I can’t have a distraction right now – that would be bad.

Not good timing and I am not ready to face the kids with anything like that 😮

So I’m just gonna leave that alone – he can text but not come over anymore.

Anyway… my daughter is teasing me currentlycause some guy is on tv cooking salmon and yuck 😝 I don’t like seafood… he’s all excited and he’s making every kind of salmon possible and she says to me “it’s not like you will ever be making salmon” lol

And then they made coffee pot salmon and she’s laughing – then they switched to salmon ice cream 😳😝 ewww

She keeps making me laugh – gonna go hang with her for little while ✌️😘

I be back tmrw to read – gnite ✌️

Good morning …

Yesterday I was on a roll with my stuff … handling it well. Been doing that this morning also.

Actually to be honest, I am nervous to do this all by myself, because I am unfamiliar in this.

But at the same time, I think it will be better? I think that at least. Because I haven’t had a chance to speak or stick up for myself – and now I will… whether that makes a difference or not… but finally I know I will stick up for myself. 🙏 so whatever happens – that’s on me now. I take control. ✌️

Anyway, like I said… I was on a roll… I took a break about 4:30pm? And shortly after, I got a text…

It was country boy. So we chatted for a little bit. He sucks at text messages lol totally! He always has. He is NOT a texter lol …

And I am not really a phone talker lol. I like texts better. I do the phone with people who are close in my life, but that’s it.

Anyway we texted … he does that for me – he’s very thoughtful with things, and typically always very respectful of how I am.

He asked what I was doing… I said nothing, was just working on my stuff. Taking a break.

He’s been in my life since 2014… he knows literally everything… he knows who I am, how I am, what I have been through – all of it.

He has been an incredible friend through things always!! He is currently aware I am silent and stay to myself. He knows all of it.

He met me before everything just exploded. So he has known and seen all of it. I don’t have to hold anything like that back. He’s very kind, understanding and supportive.

I do actually feel great ease with him.

Anyway… he asked if was ok if he came over. He has been one of the only 2 people who have come over my house – the other person is my girlfriend who helped me move in.

He’s been over my house twice before – once when I first moved in, to come check it out … and then again back in November. Oh wait no … correction 3 times… cause he came over to talk when the shut downs first happened – we hadn’t spoken since November.

We had a disagreement in November and I’ve never gone silent on him before, but I did at that time. I don’t think he expected that. I dunno. Was just where I was. I am silent. Just let me. I am tired. I have never shut off before. And it was sudden.

When the shut downs happened he checked on me. And we were talking.

He came over in March and we straightened it out and talked about what he wanted and what I wanted. I don’t think we understand each other very well… he is so much a man, and I am so much a woman lol ✌️

I believe really strongly – if you want to be in my life… then BE there. If you don’t, then whatever. I don’t really mess around with that. I am hard core in that area. Especially right now. I don’t want anything or anyone clouding up my life. I am massively protective. If you come in my life like that, you will be important.

And I also don’t want to be for a moment – I have something VERY important to me… so if he can’t do that, then he’s not what I want. It’s extremely important to me.

That one thing… if you can’t do – then it’s a no. I won’t back down on that one. He is well aware how strongly I stand on that.

Anyway, I don’t mind him coming over, I like his company. Like I said he’s always been a good friend through things. He does have a peace about him and I am at ease with him. He does have a good heart and he’s been a good friend and just knows everything.

So… he came over … when he showed up… he had brought a Dr Pepper for me… that was really thoughtful.

And we sat and talked for a little while. He told me what’s up with him and his kids and I told him my stuff…

I am very womanly compared to him. He is manly, and very country… but also a jock … he plays baseball normally – but he also owns 2 businesses… a tree company and a fence company – so he’s been doing that because they aren’t currently playing baseball ⚾️ … but there are talks of it coming back on? We see

He took me for an evening walk… it was really nice. We are out here in the country – it’s so incredibly beautiful and peaceful all the time!!

The stars are brilliant in the country. And it was a warm night… it was just peaceful. We chatted and laughed … he mentioned snakes so I got a little closer lol

That’s when he took my hand 😮 … my hands are soft, I love lotion and I’m girly… I am very soft… he works hard with his businesses and normally plays baseball ⚾️… his hands are rough and callused.

It was nice, he feels protective… but it kinda took me by surprise. I just haven’t had anyone take my hand like that. I just don’t remember. I’m so busy being protective of myself and keeping everyone away from me lol. ✌️

His hands engulfed mine. And we walked back to my house holding hands. It was comforting. I felt protected? I felt a twinge when he took my hand.

We came back and watched a little TV and laughed. He played a card game with me. He just takes my mind away when I need that. He always seems to know when I need that. He never pressures me. He respects who I am

He stayed until 11:30pm… he had to work today and we both had to get to bed… he lives maybe an hour or so from me?

I am not totally comfortable with a man staying over, so I did not offer.

I put my shoes on, and walked him to his big giant truck … just to say goodnight and goodbye.

I went to give him a hug goodbye… and he kissed me 😮 … we did NOT social distance 😮 I allowed it …whoa

I am still even now a little stunned 😳😮 Oh my god! My knees went weak 😮 uh oh

First of all… umm I have not been kissed in a really long time. That caught me by surprise.

And we have already had this discussion… we did talk a little more last night – I do think because we are so different, we don’t always understand each other … he is a total man… I am a total woman.

But that kiss 😮 whoa!! 😳 uh oh

Crap.

My mind is a million miles away from that stuff. I keep everyone away cause I don’t want any problems.

I do love his friendship. And I am at ease with him..

And with talking last night … I again laid out what I want. If he can’t do that – then do NOT attempt. He attempted 😮 whoa

I don’t understand him.

I don’t even know what to think. That kiss … since leaving my ex I just don’t let anyone come close like that. I forget. And my ex was not loving or kind.

Careful country boy … Playing with the queen of hearts ♥️ ✌️

I keep everyone away and I even try to be careful with him. I was not careful enough 😳😮 crap

Do not get sidetracked!! Nope do not do that.

I am attracted to him.

I like his heart, he is gentle and kind…

I find him hot… dammit

He’s just… I don’t know?

Look here’s the thing… if I just let go with him… he’s already electric to me – so … if he blew my mind completely away with “stuff” … and by stuff I mean sex…

If he blew my mind there, I would completely fall in love … so nope … I can’t … but I do find him completely electric ⚡️… whoa 😮 crap

I control myself because um I have one thing that is really important to me. So I want that. I need to have that … if I don’t find it than whatever… but if I’m gonna have something – I have one thing that’s really truly important to me. So… I want that. Period and done. It has to be with that. Because of who I am. I want to relax in this thing I want. It’s very important to me.

He knows all of that.

He has his life – I have mine. We are friends – he is electric 😮 … stay away!!! Lol

He made me breathe heavy 😮 whoa 😳 uh oh

Ok so how to handle that. I um… I’m not ready to fall in love.

Crap ..what the fuck 2020?!!! I hate you 2020!!

I know you don’t get to chose … who or how you fall in love … and you don’t get to chose when… I don’t know?

I hold back… I can’t let go… but I want him ~ deep breath ~

Not good… distraction – stay away!!

Yeah if I go further, I’m going to fall in love with him… he needs to understand that. Stay away if you can’t handle. Seriously.

So. Yeah – that was a kiss 💋 😮 whew

Asshole – kidding I only say that because he’s electric to me and then he kissed me 😮 made me melt… and then he had to go. Whew, omg

Ok so … there was that 😳😮

I kinda feel sick? – but also have a smile… what the hell is that?

Yes I like him. Like I said… he’s great. But I need one thing. And I can’t let go without that. I don’t ask for anything else, just one thing… and that is important to me

So… either step up to bat… or go sit on the bench lol ✌️

I don’t know what to think. He is a distraction! … stay focused!!! No distractions!! 😳

This is dangerous!! He is in dangerous territory now. Walkin that fine line buddy. ✌️

Now when I think of him 🤨 I breathe heavy 🤨 great … no more coming over – now he’s dangerous whoa 😮

Ok enough heavy breathing … back to work… I’ll be back later

So alright… ready to start the day!

I was thinking something… when I mentioned attention and how I only like it when “I” command it lol 😄✌️ …

It just made me remember … I did a lot of PR work (public relations) with the police department, when I was first trying to get out…

The police were my safe place. ❤️ I know they get a bad rep now … and is hard. My police are good guys – I love them very much! Not all of them are bad… some are amazing human beings, who do actually want to serve and protect. They helped me get away kinda – they were my first step. I needed them. They gave me safety.

They were my first step in getting out. It means a lot to me.

My police are humble and kind. They are good guys. Please take people on a “case by case” basis, some are incredibly amazing.

Just like in a group of many different people of any descent or occupation or whatever … you will have some good, and you will have some bad in every group.

If you ask for my opinion… I would say that to become a police officer should be a lot harder. That’s not to say their training is not difficult – it is.

But I just mean, schooling – all other jobs require degrees, that should be required there too.

Also 🤨… when I take a job 🤨… I am forced to watch and read all the sexual harassment things… which is good… it’s just they push that heavily and constantly… I have only had one experience I had to say something with.

(I worked with some guy who just nonchalantly sent me a picture of his junk 🤨… he was creepy. I just went to my boss, handed him my phone and said “handle this” or I will) lol ✌️

But point is… they should be required to take classes on public relations and racism. It should be an entire course.

Maybe also better mental screening… mental health is important and effects many… also in that… you could maybe detect any severe attitudes?

Nothing is ever perfect, and much change IS needed… but I’m just saying … I do love my police and they were there when I needed them.

I support my police, but I also support the fight against racism. I hurt to watch 2 things I support strongly go up against each other. ☹️💔

Anyway… sorry sidetracked … when I was with them, like I said… I did PR things… I did school assemblies and store openings, special events, etc…

I’m very confident when I command attention… I have zero fear of public speaking to a group like that. It doesn’t bother me at all. I can capture your attention. I don’t have any issues there. Of course it’s not with my personal things …

But I have a way with people? It’s very easy to me… sorta… in that setting totally – fearless. I can be in front of kids or adults and speak confidently. I do not fear how I am thought of.

Ok… so having said that… I need to apply my “fearlessness” here … I will be public speaking, so I have to just think on those terms for court

And then… facts only… that rings in my head.

Ok so I will comb through everything… get what I want situated… I will remove any feelings or emotions. I can have none here!! Seriously zero.

I won’t need them, the facts will be enough.

The one thing I will be nervous with is being in the same room with the devil. Bleh 😝 that trips me up a little bit. I do still have fear towards him, and the courts. It’s been traumatizing horrendously.

But I’m going to get rid of the fear… cause my plan is to remove my feelings and also my opinions. I am just going to stick to the straight facts.

If I am successful in doing that, I don’t think he will be able to knock me down anymore?

He is banking on me to be soft and emotional… he’s been trying to break me… he was with me since I was a kid… he knows who I am… he knows exactly how to read me.

I have to control my facial expressions – he can read those easy. I must have only facts and no emotions. No opinions, no feelings, only facts. You can’t argue facts.

He knows I still fear him. He plays on that. He also has not had to answer to anything, so he feels he can get away with anything. And he has.

So I have to be someone he does not know. I kinda am…

I’ve been through all this, I think I am stronger – I look back to see what I walked through and I’m like oh wow, I was strong… not really cause those moments REALLY sucked!! And I wasn’t totally strong while sobbing lol… I have been through hell.

But those moments showed me my strength and my spirit ❤️

And I never want fear to determine my life.

I hated all those hard moments … but I also think – even though I hated them… I needed them… I needed some life lessons. I learned.

I can learn here too. ❤️ Let me see what I can do 🙏

www.youtube.com/watch

Country boy helped me tonight, he made me feel better 😊

He represented himself in court against his ex. So he just let me ask him questions. He would answer one, and I would have another question … but he answered each one.

I can’t do any worse than it already is… and I do have the right to speak up in court.

I will have to keep composure – which I am sure I can do, as long as, I am organized and ready.

My last court went well… I can do that again. I have that now.

Country boy said only facts… they will want only facts – both within the marriage and also within the court case.

The 2 judges that preside over divorce cases in my area – are both men. So that’s a thing but whatever. Just facts – I don’t need to be nervous. It will be ok

Confidence. Keep thinking that.

I’m gonna just act like he’s not even there – I don’t want to see him or his slimy lawyer – I know I have to. But I don’t want to look at either one. They are vicious!

I have nothing to be afraid of… I tell the truth and I have things to back up everything I say. I have things in writing! I can back everything up.

I should not be the one fearing. ✌️

But I still do.

Honestly though… here’s the lesson on this one for you…

The only one who will protect you and make sure you are safe… is yourself. Period

So maybe now it gets better? I’m gonna try to protect myself 🙏

No ones coming near me after this lol kidding … I’m totally kidding … but I dunno? Lol ✌️its been worse than rough – you have no idea

Almost over 🙏

That was really nice of country boy to let me ask him those questions… he doesn’t like to talk about his ex and those moments… he went through a lot too – he has custody of all his kids, his ex is a drug addict, he walked in on her and some other guy, he came home early from work one day to see that. And that was it. He was done

They have 4 kids… all are now grown… but one has a severe disability – cerebral palsy … immobile and also non verbal. The mind is ok, and totally normal … just the body isn’t. It’s been rough on him as well. The kids don’t see their mum. It’s been hard

He was so sincere with his answers helping me tonight. He was very honest – I appreciate that very much – he didn’t have to do that. But I’m glad he did – I hate that I asked him painful things, but I appreciate the help.

When I said thank you, he said of course. 😊

I would normally be putting little hearts everywhere cause I’m a heart person and this means a lot to me lol – but no let’s not do that lol ✌️ “friends only” …

He might be awesome and have a good heart … he’s a good guy… and I like him…. but – there’s always a “but” right? He just doesn’t want what I want. I am not willing to settle, he already knows that. We are both stubborn so whatever ✌️😘 I’m not budging and he’s not. Lol

But he still wants to be in my life and be my friend. I like that. 😊

Ok well anyway… I do feel better because of what he told me. 😊

This woman who is my lawyer… she said she mailed me the paper to sign – I check every day there is nothing…

She wants me to come down and give that to her this coming Monday.

In her email regarding this matter she says at the end… otherwise the motion will be on August 24th…

First of all – she has sent me nothing – I have received nothing… I check religiously!

Second of all… what motion??? And she puts down the date of August 24th – it sounded wrong to me?

Thank god for this blog again – I wrote it down. August 14th at 8:30am… and it’s a hearing… why is she telling me wrong information???

I knew she wasn’t working for me!! I knew she was killing me!

Yet another reason- I do not trust.

She has not helped me at all… she has only been a lawyer so I just have legal counsel but did nothing. He didn’t pay her.

And here she is giving me incorrect information… she gave me incorrect information with the last hearing… I went anyway…

If I was to not have written that down… I would have missed the hearing on the 14th cause tells me is 10 days later on the 24th!!

Lies!

This is my life right here!!!

What happens if I don’t sign her off? What would happen? Can I refuse to let her off ?

Although I don’t know which is the worse evil? Having her or being at mercy by myself?

I just worry – from now until then he can bury me in motions… he can come at me full force on my own. I’m scared – I hate him

She does nothing for me anyway… she’s letting me fry… she has always let me fry… she was supposed to protect me and she didn’t – not ever during this whole thing – I lost every single time!!! I don’t even know how!!!

So I can do any worse right?

If I’m gonna fry, I might as well fry myself… so maybe I’ll go finish this off with her on Monday. 😳

Any conversations with her make me panic! Completely!! This entire time it’s been that way… I can’t afford another lawyer… there is no pro-bono

I was stuck with her.

What’s that saying – good riddance to bad rubbish?

Maybe I could do better myself? It really couldn’t be any worse.

And at least I get to speak and make my own decisions. Please dear lord 🙏 let me get through this!!!!

I can do this. I totally can.

But let me ask this… if I refuse to sign anything… what happens ? Do you know?

I’m just curious?

Once I sign… I am at his mercy, completely unprotected!!

He’s been awful he’s gonna come after me hard. He has zero mercy… he didn’t even care if I died or not with the cancer and even during that he tried to continue to bury me in motion after motion.

The courts made him stop, while I went through that. Thank god.

So what do you know?

Remember my new coronavirus neighbor friend lol … she’s been back at work so I don’t get to see her as often – we see each other in passing.

She works at a casino 🎰… they have reopened the area casinos now for a few weeks.

She said that all the workers wear masks … it is required by law that all workers in any capacity anywhere must wear masks.

But she said the people don’t. 😮 she said it’s been really busy, more than normal… probably because people are dying to get out 😳 do that before they shut down again.

In a casino – you eat, drink, smoke – they allow smoking 🚬 inside. They don’t follow the same rules because they are owned by a reservation.

So people just leave the masks off. 😮

She said there is talk of closing down the casinos again.

I only got to see her for a brief second. She said she is having problems with her family again… I see the dynamic so I can kinda see what’s going on.

I feel bad – her family is very hard on her. They are, but she gets snippy at them too.

My landlord is away tonight – she went to Reno. I am all alone out here 😳😄✌️

No worries though – it will be a nice quiet night.

Also… I have never had Indian food before… I am not familiar with it… IF I were to try…

What are some good dishes? Not too spicy – cause my tummy can be sensitive…

What are the very best Indian dishes?

I’m not sure when I will try it? But I want to know what’s good, so when I do I am ready! Lol – preparing to try it lol ✌️

Do you have a favorite recommendation? My only request is no seafood dishes. Otherwise what is good? I want to taste.

Ok I have to finish something up – but I will be back ✌️😘

Good morning ☀️… beautiful windy sunny morning lol… please don’t shut off my power 🙏🙏 heat and wind make me nervous lol

I saw that Arizona is having a massive fire 🔥 – my parents used to live in Arizona … that’s where they retired to. They used to live in Catalina. 😮😮 (my parents are no longer there)

www.youtube.com/watch

Yikes 😳 hot temps and wind!

On a happier note… I woke this morning to a text from my oldest lol…

When the boys come over on Fridays … we always talk about all kinds of stuff – including video games and things…

One of the convos is always about favorite Pokémon game lol… they always pick the regular ones – and when it gets to me… they tease me cause I don’t play those other ones … I only really like ONE lol

But when I say which one they tease me, because they don’t consider that a Pokémon game 🤨😄 umm yeah it is!!

Well guess the F what?? They are remaking it ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ my favorite Pokémon game… is Pokémon Snap 😄😘✌️

I like pictures and I like them to be perfect – I love that game!!! Let me just do that!! I can snap Pokémon pictures over and over woo hoo!!

We talk about it all the time, I always say they should redo, Snap 🙏… they say too boring won’t do… Yay!!! The remake ❤️

Here was what was in his text this morning… all he said was “Mom look!” …

www.youtube.com/watch

😮😮😮😮😮 yay!!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ I am excited about a game lol … a Pokémon game lol … who knew!!

Woo hoo!!

Ok I have to run… I be back later ✌️

Finally home now… car running good. ❤️

And yes … all day long… every 15 to 30 minutes – I get a reminder that Apple is going to make my battery suck later tonight 🤨 stop telling me!!!! It couldn’t be anymore annoying!! What’s with this constant annoying notification on this?? So I can constantly think about the battery?? 🤨

Just tell me maybe twice… the first time I might not be fully paying attention… second time – a reminder “just in case” … but there is literally NO reason to tell me this every 15/30 minutes 🤨 ALL DAY LONG!!! Ok I get it!

If it wasn’t so annoying, I would make sure would be unable to update – but I don’t want another full day of these notifications!! Is that their deal? We will annoy them to ensure they update lol – fricken Apple 

Then I also got notifications on weather 😳😮 uh-oh 😮😳

I looked at the temps and they don’t seem overly bad? Are in the 90’s… but they are set to climb

We will have a daytime humidity of only 8 to 15%

So heat… and very little humidity ♨️♨️♨️ …

Add to that… North winds 15 to 35 mph 😳😮 any fires will move fast!

I should be ok… I am clear from any major trees or brush… and if the electric company shuts the power off (because they have been in trouble for causing “several” really bad fires, INCLUDING “THE WORST” fire in California history “The Camp Fire” )

Little by little since last year – I have been collecting items that will help us through this, and prepare…

If they should turn off power – I should be ok… I have water, non perishable food, a portable shower – cause I need that!… I have battery operated lights, I have a tiny little air conditioning unit for at least 1 room, I also have a small chargeable 150v battery – and also a portable solar panel to charge that… oh and I have a cooler for any drinks or foods that need refrigeration

I also have a hot plate that can use the battery with if needed – so I can cook. We can also charge our phones with the battery so we don’t have to sit in my car to do that.

So I think I have prepared for that this year?? 🙏 I am trying to make sure I am covered… we are gonna find out if I forgot anything, eventually!!! 😳

If they could just simply repair their lines – we wouldn’t have that problem at all!! The court cases due to those fires I mentioned – made them file for bankruptcy.

https://www.cpuc.ca.gov/pgechapter11/

So they are going to do it again, until things are fixed, which will take years and years!!

I know you can’t fully be ready for things in life… but I feel a little better if I try to prepare… am at ease thinking won’t be as bad as it was last year!!

Last year was the first year they shut power off… I had no electricity and no water… they gave no warning the first time they did that… and customers were pissed because we have to pay for PG&E’s greed – they have a monopoly… and we are at their mercy cause they can’t do their job or handle their money.

If they had always maintained their lines – which they don’t – we would not have these issues.

That was the beginning of October 2019.

That weekend they gave power back for a day and cut it back off! The whole entire month of October 2019… I had no water or power!! And into November it went!! Ugh – I was never so happy to see winter rains!!

I will never forget that! So since then – I have been preparing – what did I need that won’t make that so horrific? I think I have prepared pretty good. 🙏

Ok so… anything else life wants to throw at me?? Lol – I am preparing!!

I feel like I have to prepare for literally everything 🤨 lol … I should probably get more toilet paper 🧻 lol 🤨 … I do need to restock on actual normal batteries.

What else would I have to seriously prepare for?? Maybe I should prepare incase I get coronavirus? Cause even though I don’t want that… it “could” happen… am I prepared? I don’t think so on that one. That will be the next thing on my list of things to prepare for

I don’t want to panic… so works best if I prepare.

And just FYI… I also know that no matter how prepared I think I am… life likes to throw curve balls, so “some things” you just can’t be prepared for 🤨 … I just want to try to prepare, with the things I am able to prepare with.

At least is something – not so much at mercy 😘✌️ … I hate being at mercy!!

One of my friends told me… now mind you – this is hear say… just a rumor currently – because I can not verify yet…

But they said some workers at one of these local stores – has coronavirus 🤨😮 … again “hear say”! I HAVE NOT verified the info yet…

That would be horrific. A store full of people possibly compromised and being around other people and so on. 😮

Hopefully is just a incorrect gossipy rumor. ✌️

But I will remain wearing my “being around people” hazmat gear 🤨✌️ I definitely do not want to die or hurt anyone else!

I want to be safe and sound!!

www.youtube.com/watch

I feel more change coming though 😮

2020 is forcing updates everywhere!! Which I suppose ARE actually needed and we ARE learning things every day.

These are some really tough lessons though! ✌️