Today was a good day!!

I got my life placed back in my own hands ❤️ I believe I do have a firm grasp.

Then work called me… they are swamped with calls currently… so they need me on Friday … I will get to do my job while also covering the phones and things.

That’s another 8 hours on my paycheck woo hoo!

And then lastly … my landlord is going on vacation for the 4th of July. She is going to a beach house up in Oregon.

She said she would take $200 off the rent if I can handle garbage and watering the ranch… which yes I can do.

So in one day… I took my life back, got more work, and lessened my bills lol ✌️❤️

Woo hoo!!

I want this song for today…

www.youtube.com/watch

However… when I graduated high school – we picked a senior song … they picked an older song for us at that moment…

The senior song that was picked for my senior graduating class… was… Queen “We are the Champions” Lol

www.youtube.com/watch

So both songs work for me lol 😄✌️

And this one…

www.youtube.com/watch

But also this one…

(This one has bad words so just be warned lol ✌️) … when I was down and he was kicking me – this was the song I chose a lot … it made me feel better …

www.youtube.com/watch

I have not even begun to fight yet… but I do have a fire burning and I believe I am ready now?

And I do believe I will rise from the ashes so… gonna hit that! This is gonna be me…

www.youtube.com/watch

Watch my strength 😘✌️

I would say be afraid… but I am nothing to be afraid of… only he should be afraid.

This man held me down and pushed me further down … while my whole family died one right after the other… he didn’t care and went full throttle trying to crush me during that…

And while I had cancer he was intense – completely did his worst… did not let me come up for air… courts actually had to step in to stop that, because it was so bad and harsh while I was literally trying to fight through cancer… while they were saving my life – he was trying to take it

So if I seem a little harsh, it’s because I had to sit there and let him. My hands were tied behind my back, and I couldn’t speak…

I am no longer sick… I don’t fight cancer anymore… I fought that bitch and won, even WITH his ass crushing me.

I have survived all of it, all while he continued to take revenge for me leaving him… he wants to make sure I can’t do any better without him.

Allow me to educate him on what he lost. 💋

I get stronger every day… it’s my turn.

That son of a bitch gonna watch me rise ✌️

I can talk a lot of words and feel strength now… but I go up against the devil and he’s dirty.

I do think I have a good grasp here – I just have ALOT of work to do.

I am almost there. I am almost free ❤️

I will have my life back and I am also going to get my name back too!

I will have my original name back! Then I will have you saying my name lol (kidding) but I am excited to have my name back. … I’m gonna wanna hear my name all the time lol ✌️😄 scream that for me lol

And on the other side of 2020… everything will be different including me 😮 …epic right? Lol

We will see how epic … I am excited to see this too ✌️

All that devastation – I kept my strength of spirit to survive … so I have just been in training for this.

It will be fine… an Epic ending

And my new chapter starting 2021 ❤️ my new chapter starts win or lose.

This is my last fight. My first stand and my last fight.

So deep breaths. Confidence… relax – do this. I battled through a lot… and I’m still standing – I lean slightly lol but I am upright now lol ✌️😘

I am still afraid of him – but whatever…

I was not able to fight before now… now here I stand. It’s in my own hands now.

I can finally fight ❤️

I have my life with me… it’s in huge folders. I will need some wheelie type cart… I won’t be able to carry this by myself into court.

There is a lot.

She kinda kissed my ass…

“Hi there sweetie, how are you? You are looking so good, look at you”

The last time this woman saw me… I had cancer. I was sick.

Her voice level is that level when you are being all cutsie?

“Oh hi sweetie” 🤨

Like she’s my friend…

And then she gave me my files and told me the areas I should zone in on… I will heed the advice and the source. Any info is good info

I can’t read this well, cause then she said to me… “if you get stuck, or need any help at all – I will still have and keep my email”

Why would you help me now? Why not help all along? Why trying to be nice now?

Keep your bridges – don’t burn them… you hold them – Incase you need them.

I will heed her advice, and keep her word on that bridge… we see. If I need, I will pull that.

She also said… she feels horrible for leaving me in this position against him at this time… 🤨

But she was decent. He has paid nothing… so any work that was done… I will give her props for that. Thank you…

She told me, I owe her nothing – she wipes it from my file. I am free from that. Whew

I am absorbing everything

I had my mask on the whole time – she could only see my eyes…

I like when you can only see my eyes – then you can’t get a true read on me – I like that.

Like in poker … you hold your cards.

All my experiences are things I am gonna pull from here.

After everything is said and done… my entire life – will be completely different 😮

I am about to have some massive life changing moments

It’s in my hands!! I have it seatbelted in beside me lol ✌️

Do you ever have moments of extreme clarity 😮 …

This woman had my life in her hands. Everything that comes out of this woman’s mouth – is a lie 😮 I have never trusted her, but she is what I had. I don’t know these things. Is way above me.

And he is slimy so. Who knows

I continued to believe that she was going to help me…

In the same way during the marriage – I thought “one day be better”

Whoa 😮

Flaw correction needed right there 😳😮 whoa 😮

But yeah… not one word this woman says is trustworthy

And right there – I put my life in her hands 😮

I married Satan – I put my life in his hands 😮

Whoa – seeing a lesson 😮

Ok. I think I get it? ☹️

Well that’s a sucky lesson 👎

Now it’s on me… so… I am facing Satan all by myself 😮 my fate rests in my own hands!! Whoa!

Look at me all growing up ❤️✌️ without my mom and dad

Who do you trust the most ever – should be yourself… always – be strong and believe!!

I hope. 🙏 But yeah – this bitch lies 🤨 ugh… tells me incorrect things and lies about everything… dude!!! It’s blatant at this point 😮

And she had my life in her hands just like he did. Whoa

What is wrong with me there??

Although there is a saying… before you go believing “you” are the asshole, look around to make sure you are not surrounded by assholes lol.

Sorry my granddaddy said a lot of sayings that run through my mind!! Dammit, now they sink in lol ✌️

See … I can hear your words. They will stick and I will face something that clicks and boom I remember

I always thought having a lawyer would be better than being left wide open and someone who knew what they were doing would protect me…

And this was a woman… a fuckin woman!!

What the fuck is that?? Whoa

See you can’t trust a man or a woman … you have to know that person and then even still…

Do you ever truly trust your life ?

That is a harsh outlook to me – whew 😝 that’s heavy!!

Anyway… she’s a lying sack of shit – sorry but she is. I’m gonna just call it like I see it. A duck is a duck…

And I allowed that to have my life 😮 … sorry keep blowing my own mind with that stuff

Yeah whatever – she sucks, I can’t believe I let her have my life like that.

I am mad at myself to see that. I should be smarter than that.

And whoa … I feel hardness in this lesson… ugh I hate hardness!! Bleh…

I can’t relax with hardness bleh!!!

Lessons to be learned

I want peace – and I will achieve that.

Just remember … who do you trust with your life? Whoa … sorry that is so heavy to me!!

Are they worth it? And do you truly see them? Open your eyes – watch your life, protect yourself.

I have to be careful in this lesson… I feel like it can go 2 ways …

I don’t trust anyone ever ever ever again lol… and hardness sets in 😮 whoa – I don’t want that one ..crap

So how to be normal and trust? lol wow… I definitely do not like this lesson!!! Dammit life!

I can’t believe is a woman, and doesn’t care? Didn’t protect and lies whoa 😮… to another woman! ☹️ where is your character?

Sorry I just wasn’t thinking and didn’t know. I trust women because I am a woman… and I don’t feel intimidation and I can relate to…

Some you just click with perfectly ?

But some? I just didn’t think in this setting that would happen.

Whatever – ok meeting this “so called” woman. That is sad.

So I guess I needed lessons … see how I get those? 🤨

I hate adulting AND still having lessons!! Both suck! Learn your lessons young! Do your thing – believe in yourself. Handle yourself.

Watch for morals, and compassion. ✌️ end of story.

Bleh… I don’t want to see this woman but I have to go.

Facing a minion 🤨

Today I get my files 😮

Today is the last day I have to feel any panic with this woman. The last time I have to deal with her (I think 🙏) I hope

Today it will be set completely on my own shoulders 😮

Whoa 😮 ok … it’s just a memorable moment in time in my life.

Years from now I will look back and think about all this…

What will I think? How will it change me?

I am nervous cause it’s pretty big to me.

I am regaining my own power?

And this is my power. I am just nervous if I can wield it correctly 🙏 just because is not my area of expertise. At all!

But ok… so I won’t be back til way later

“Today I get my very own power, placed back in my very own hands 😮😮”

www.youtube.com/watch

😮

Whew! Ok. That was a day. I did not finish everything like normal 😮 my first time not doing that 😮 … usually I’m spot on … slight perfection

First time not 😮 I couldn’t fit it all in … I failed in time management – but in my defense… you try to do something, and then things happen so you just don’t know. I don’t really have control… and I move fast! Ish… sometimes lol ✌️😄 I am fast … just older with things so that adds the “ish” lol

Ugh ok fine … today I was not spot on 🤨😝 bleh!!!

I just had a little more and it would have been perfect, like always… but they don’t want you staying and working like that ?? Ok whatever – done then.

I didn’t actually leave until 5:30pm 🤫 lol I got most done… I just like to have it all done… so little bothered. No big deal… just saying lol ✌️

I’m off now – so that’s done.

Now to get my files tmrw. I feel like – well… let’s just not do emotions there. So I’m gonna cut that off. Cause that totally almost happened. That is hard to me!

So that’s about it. I am gonna get comfy, and then read for just a little while.

Gnite 😘✌️

Awww 😔☹️ I have bad stuff this weekend 😮

Probably the busiest and the most saddest cases I have had yet 😮

And then that guy just broke my heart 😮 aww 💔

I wanna just tell you, but I can’t. They break my heart though 💔 I feel 3 of them really closely.

It’s just sad – you can still see and feel the heartbreak even though isn’t yours. 💔 That is HARD!

Yikes for today 😮

www.youtube.com/watch

That song totally!! ☹️💔

Ok so it’s that kind of a day – yikes 😔

But that is the job and how it goes. So ya know … you have good days, and then you have hard ones. ✌️ That’s how life goes

I have a clock here that is wrong – I just looked at it and panicked … It says 1pm… I was gonna have a heart attack if it was 1pm!!

Thankfully it is only 10:45am Sunday morning – whew …

But it does feel like “a lot” has happened in that time frame for it to only be 10:45am!! I will take it though – need that time to complete everything!!

Ok …back, who knows when ✌️😘

Oh my god! Nonstop since I got in

And I have someone here … but I’m not sure what he wants yet… he is scared because of the COVID 19 signs on the door lol

He is on the phone out front. I am waiting. Not sure who he is or what he wants yet…

I have a lot of cases going on right now… and aww we have some really sad ones 💔

Ok I have to be ready for whoever this is

These are songs that I love… but I do not speak the language…

Unless it’s been translated or is legendary – I have no idea what they say… otherwise, just love these songs …

Sukiyaki ❤️ Kyu Sacamoto

www.youtube.com/watch

https://youtu.be/C35DrtPlUbc

That one is just so beautiful, right?? I remember my parents would have that on the stereo and I would sing along – but just imitating the sounds … because I didn’t know that language – I was little ✌️ loved this song always! ❤️

And then I can’t leave off Psy

Gentleman

www.youtube.com/watch

https://youtu.be/ASO_zypdnsQ

The next one is because of my kids influences lol … I love Twice … and this song is my favorite ❤️ Cheer up ❤️

www.youtube.com/watch

https://youtu.be/c7rCyll5AeY

I will usually just fall in love with the music first though .. before the lyrics

I don’t even know what language this next one is?? I am not sure?

I think of this song, because of a meme actually – but I love the song – no idea what it says lol … or where is from??

www.youtube.com/watch

https://youtu.be/A306Y7a4NRo

This next one – I really don’t care what language it’s in – it could be English “who knows” lol… I don’t really care cause it makes me smile every single time lol ❤️😄 if it’s bad – don’t tell me. Just let me have it ❤️

www.youtube.com/watch

https://youtu.be/MlW7T0SUH0E

What can I even say about Latin America – some massive greats .. there are too many to list so just my favorites …

www.youtube.com/watch

https://youtu.be/JsUt2jsLM1k

How do you not know or love Selena? Como La Flor ❤️ I found her because of this cross over song she did … she did a few, the English songs drew my attention and she was amazing English and Spanish … loss of talent way too early!! She was a bright star 🌟 This song drew me to her… what talent …

www.youtube.com/watch

https://youtu.be/VRU2qs82DAg

Ricky Martin – I remember from Menudo lol … ahh the 80’s lol … but we had his Livin La Vida Loca

www.youtube.com/watch

https://youtu.be/p47fEXGabaY

Enrique Iglesias – Bailando

www.youtube.com/watch

https://youtu.be/b8I-7Wk_Vbc

And this one I like… but maybe racy? Lol

www.youtube.com/watch

https://youtu.be/kJQP7kiw5Fk

And then of course … I am so sorry – my apologies but I do like this song 😘✌️😄

www.youtube.com/watch

https://youtu.be/AMT698ArSfQ

And what country gave me this one?…

www.youtube.com/watch

https://youtu.be/jofNR_WkoCE

That one speaks English though – I understand that one lol… that one just makes me smile lol ❤️

I have a lot more… but for right now – this is good enough for tonight… just was thinking about some of these ❤️ – I will do others another time ✌️

They make me smile ❤️✌️ love influences like that

I’m not sure how much I will be around tmrw … tmrw at work might be really busy? 😮😳

Bye for now 😘✌️ Gnite

Ps Happy Father’s Day to the amazing fathers on earth, as well as … in heaven 🕯🙏