God’s sense of humor

Yeah I don’t like it…. I do not like gods sense of humor!! I swear someone up there says “watch this, let’s see how she handles this” as they all laugh 🤨 I’m sure of it!

Whatever …

Not funny

https://youtu.be/89S-RbszwJE

Alright so where should I start?

Ok well to start the morning I had staff issues … ones that I had to step in between, because personality clashes … they young. 20’s

Both very strong, but very different – but that is good… because I can see which one do best with which family – I like to have a variety to offer … it makes families more comfortable

BUT we must be team – they my team now so… yeah we gonna handle this. At first I speak with them and clear a few things …

But I so busy … my phone rings off the hook! And was last day of end of month omg

Ok breathe

Guy text me at some point in morning, but I in meetings and handling things and have my own shit – yeah who knew funerals be so intense? Omg

But he say a lot 😳

Just a lot of repeating what he already say – he love our connection, thinks I’m awesome… when I tell someone they be like “awww”

I like my life all nice and peaceful – I try VERY hard to be peaceful. I do not like a lot of craziness in ALL areas… I like peace ☮️

I feel like I currently have a lot of craziness 😳

https://youtu.be/-N4jf6rtyuw

See what happens when I come back to life?? See!!! Is way more peaceful in middle of nowhere and isolating lol

Aren’t there Monks who don’t speak to anyone for very long time? I should have been that! Vow of silence lol

https://youtu.be/u9Dg-g7t2l4

So whatever – obviously I did not become a Monk

Well anyway… I work very late – until about 7:30… so about 12 hours … but I do good and get done ✔️

And then … I come home and walk in door and my phone blowing up – nope not doing that – I done.

And then my text messages start going off … 2 overlapping dings so I know is 2 different people … ok well who is it and what the hell is happening … fine I will look …

And this is where gods sense of humor comes in… it was the guy with a text of an emoji … he keeps using the emoji of himself constantly even just all by itself ? Is this a thing? I do the little emojis but I do not like to use my own

Ugh lol ok – whatever … I’ve just never had someone text me like that so is weird little ??

But at the SAME time he text… country boy text … ok very funny – very fuckin funny 🤨 this is why I do not like someone’s sense of humor!!

Where is my peace?? This is why I keep to self always!!

I like nice peaceful and quiet 🤫 🙌

But I get … loco 🥴

https://youtu.be/p47fEXGabaY

How do I make that stop? I try to be sooooo unnoticeable – I fail so miserably!

Ok well whatever – life wanna go loco?

Fricken always!! So you see?

Ok so country boy is my baseball player who… well we not on same page – and he doesn’t want same so ok made your decision. But he still checks on me from time to time / I tell you how I feel about that…

He just does so that I remember he there 🙄 yeah ok … you know the old saying “shit or get off the pot” ✌️ I hated that saying lol but it is true.

I have a fire with him so I stay far away from him… lol fire is dangerous and we not on same page … so I keep distance…

I have known him for 8 years – he is 1 year older than me.

Ok I thought that when you age … ALL this SLOWS down… so at what age does that happen??

Cause I am waiting and is not happening!!!

He just checking on me, like always does … every so often he remember me and put himself back on my mind.

He knows there is fire there … I very very careful with him. And we have backstory… he was there through my cancer and divorce and the death of my father…

I would get overwhelmed and he would say be ready I picking you up and we leaving and he take me away ❤️ … he show me peace ✌️

And then ya know, he good to me so I always good back. I also care because he was there and helped my mind escape the horrific things I was going through …

But there is definitely a fire with him … so I just cautious. We just not on same page 📄

https://youtu.be/lp-EO5I60KA

But funny how it came through at exact same moment as the older guy’s text

So what does life want me to learn? What?? It’s giving me all kinda signs with stuff ? And I don’t understand??

Like what were the odds that same type person sit next to me on plane ? So that was odd

And then odd things happen here and there

And then these 2 texts ?? So what up? What you want me to learn? What is life trying to show me?

I am tired of decoding life’s little messages – can you stop?? But don’t kill me either lol … I just wanna have nice quiet peace

Why is that seriously the hardest thing in the world?? What am I doing wrong?

I do not know what I think about any of this

I usually focus on kids and work… none of this shit

So what I supposed to learn ??

Where is that peace I want? Who has that? Come take me away!

https://youtu.be/gte3BoXKwP0

I went silent on many reasons… but these things were also one of them.

I always worry because I do have urge to run away again – Y’all are crazy!! just the house kinda makes me stay but it makes me be all up in life

I’m not too sure about life – I don’t trust alot … I want to love life and live life, and I do mostly no matter where am … but at same time – I don’t trust it. So we do my way this time 😘

https://youtu.be/1JmMms9_Ou4

But I just don’t understand what I supposed to learn here? What???

I try so hard to stay away from all this!! Yup – it’s impossible unless you go to middle of nowhere and isolate.

It was the house that put me back in civilization… see why I was hesitant to come back? It was just better when I silent

Well as far as peace goes anyway. But the house made me come back to town… it was the house that brought me back … and then all the events lead me here

So what I supposed to do with this?

Ugh too much…

https://youtu.be/vdQDqcfdtcA

So whatever we see

Ugh so much stuff all the time

I need better life balance – all my life is crazy!’

https://youtu.be/itRFjzQICJU

RIP Olivia 💔 I grew up with your movies and music 🎶 ❤️