I got into a disagreement with my girlfriend… I flat out asked her if she told that man behind my back.
And she admitted. I told I didn’t appreciate that cause now opens up a whole big thing.
She said you are so close to standing up … if he is willing to do things for you or help you get a car, you should do that. You can handle him. Just use him for that.
🤨🤨🤨 handle him???? Use him?? Wtf – I don’t want to “handle” or use people! I don’t do that.
She starts in on – I am praying about it and blah blah blah.
And then she says no one tells me what I can and can’t do.
I said … I’m not trying to tell you what you can or can’t do… but as a friend I would appreciate it that if it involves MY life – you check with me or discuss with me first. I have my reasons
And she said “declined”
So I said “ok then” and that’s it.
I am mad at her for that. She thinks she is in the right. I don’t
Dammit.
And he text me this morning cause he knows I work far from where I live.
And then also, this is his “in” 🤨 I feel uncomfortable with that.
I am in need. So my caution level is extremely high!! I don’t want to use him or have this big thing…
He text me again this morning and said he’s willing to look at the car, but he is out of town until tmrw night.
I didn’t know what to say so I just said…
Look I am furious with my girlfriend for saying anything to you. That was not her place. I try very hard to do things on my own. But I appreciate that.
If I buy the part are you willing to help?
I just don’t want any pressure, and I want to be upfront with where I stand. I worry will be a thing.
He said let me just look at it first. Do not buy any part until I look at it.
I don’t feel very comfortable in this arrangement at all. I don’t like this one bit.
I am still mad at her. I know I can’t trust her with things now. She should have spoken to me first and had a discussion – this involves MY life.
I am still mad, I feel what she did was wrong and not her place. I turn to HER with my things … and now she just takes it upon herself to put me in these positions.
I don’t ever try to tell her what to do… but don’t steer my life… it is MY life – I am handling
And with the pressure that is on my shoulders currently – she just added more.
So whatever.
I am at ugly walls today – I already had someone come in to pick up a death certificate. Just as I was opening too… I didn’t have my jacket on nothin lol
Oh well – it is already hot out!!! Gonna be 110 today!!
This place is very hard to open!! My place and haunted mansion are so simple!!!
They didn’t give me the alarm code so I had to ask others luckily someone had it – This is first time opening this place…
And then there is another code to another door – I didn’t know that one either – but after I shut off alarm I went in another way.
And then the phones 🤨 I have to go to a website change the stats – it’s this whole big ordeal. Oh my god!
At the other places I just press *73 and takes the phones off call forwarding. Easy!!
It took me until 830 to get this place up and running!! I was here at 7:50!! Took me that long!
But whatever – it’s done and open. I have to get back to work, I have a ton of stuff to do!!!
I be back at some point.
Hopefully I can close this place properly 😮😳🙏
Learning Life 
“Decline”????? WTH???? I know you’re far more tolerant than I. I’d block both of them immediately.
Good luck with all of it.
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I know… that pisses me off too. I am her friend supposably and that just tells me she doesn’t care and is gonna go off and do anything she wants and not care about the friendship.
She has been a friend when I have truly needed one. She has helped me out a lot… in times that I truly needed help.
I am pissed at both what she did behind my back after I already told her NO! She went and did anyway…
And then ya know, she’s supposed to be a friend and the attitude she takes when I asked her when is regarding MY life – speak to me first… and then to say “declined”
I know that she did not do it to be hurtful… I know she did that because she “thinks” she is helping me out.
I do not use people OR “handle” people. I don’t want that done to me, and I don’t do it to others. I don’t like the way she put that.
She has no problems using people to get what she wants – I am NOT like that!!! That’s fine if she wants that in her life – but I don’t want that in mine and now I have to make sure he is aware I want nothing from him, if he wants to help – I will buy the part and I will pay him… myself.
I do not want any doors opened here.
I am thinking – I have mercy because of how she has helped me… she was there when I needed a friend and needed help…
…but that was beyond rude… what kind of friend says that??? Total disregard of friendship
So on one hand – I have mercy cause she has been there and truly did help me anytime I have needed… but that does not give her the right to just do whatever she wants when it is in regards to MY life!!!!
And again, I know she wasn’t doing it maliciously … I know she was trying to help… but her response really bothers me.
She can’t just go and do whatever she wants!!!!!!!! And I most definitely didn’t want this!!! I am handling my shit.
So I dunno. I don’t know how to feel.
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Yeah… that’s a hard call.
I know I’ve over-shared other people’s info because I don’t have the same ideas about what should be private. But I’ve always apologized and immediately stopped when I learned I crossed someone’s line. I cannot fathom refusing to honor anyone’s request to stop, most especially a friend!
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Yeah exactly… I can forgive going behind my back because I know she meant well. I know she was just wanting to help.
But then when I said please next time discuss with me first cause it involves MY life… and to say “declined”?
So basically what I get from that is she doesn’t give a F… and will do again if given chance. So that is my problem. I do not want that.
I’m not speaking to her right now. So whatever – I need time. Like you say… especially when it’s a friend!!!
I am always thoughtful of others feelings – and if I hurt them and they tell me… I will apologize and it won’t happen again cause now I know – common courtesy and kindness. Supposed to be a friend. Not thoughtful at all
She did not apologize and will do again. So I have an issue there.
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I had to cut someone similar out of my life. She not only retold stories she knew were private but sent out a newsletter to about 50 coworkers and numerous outsiders. I can’t believe she was never fired for it.
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It’s sad cause ya know, she has been there for me… in times I really needed someone
But that doesn’t give her the right to step over me and go over my head.
I’m extremely private in person- and I’ve been handling my own life just fine by myself. She didn’t need to do that and I had said no. She disregarded it then – and again when I confronted
It is hard to me… if it wasn’t that she had been there strongly for me during times I needed someone… she’d be done already.
But ya know she’s been there and she has been a good friend but that trips me up. That’s a huge thing for me
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Wow and at work too??? I’m surprised not fired for that also
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Worst that happened was that she never got promoted. For all I know, she’s still there in the same job.
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Wow!! 😮 that’s crazy – that can be a liability for a company… definitely can NOT promote that behavior – coming from an upper management would be definite liability!!!
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Even more so, she’d forward the ‘newletter’ to employees who had moved on to competitors. She’s probably still doing it. I don’t know cause I blocked all her addresses on everything.
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Wow!!! Crazy!!!
We have an employee who during corona and all the zoom meetings – would be in the hot tub or painting toe nails 😮😄😄😄
Not the same as sharing other people’s things in a newsletter (that’s nuts, I wouldn’t like that… I would definitely stay away from that person) – but people do crazy things!!
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It is your life. It must be you who decides what best for you. Yes give friendly advice but really that’s stepped way over the line. Your so right to feel like this. I would be fuming.
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Yeah… she has been a good friend… even when I tried to push her away.
She is different than me – obviously. She’s the one I didn’t know if I could be “ok” with her lifestyle? So she would try and try and try to be my friend…
I am quiet and private – she laid out her lifestyle to me right away and it was a lot to take in. She has later said she did that incase I was gonna bolt. She would rather have me just walk away in the beginning rather than be hurt.
I accepted her – not on her lifestyle … I still don’t like that… but I have accepted her as a person.
She has been good to me, and was there for me when I truly needed help. So I have mercy there.
It’s just I am mad because she went behind my back to this man … she had told me to call him… and I told her “No way, I don’t want to open any can of worms” she knows how I am. I did NOT want that!!!!!!
She took it upon herself to handle MY life… that’s how I feel anyway … worry about your own life – I’m handling mine
And I have alot on my shoulders currently!!! I did not need anymore.
And then when I said … when is regarding MY life, discuss with me first!!! That is not too much to ask and that is not telling anyone how to be… if you can’t do that within a friendship / how am I supposed to trust that friendship knowing she’s just going to do whatever she wants and disregard any friendship.
She does not have the right to handle MY life… I know she meant well, but doing that behind my back and her response is my issue!!!
So currently I am pissed at her – if you gonna be a friend then do that, you respect your friends and care about the friendship… I do not think what I asked for is a lot!! She can handle her life however she wants – but do not handle MY life without discussing with me first.
Currently I am pissed so not sure how to approach if at all… her saving grace is how she has been there for me… but this and that response was over the top
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That’s the thing. It was doing it behind your back. Not good at all. Hopefully she will understand that soon.
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I highly doubt it, but there is always hope I suppose? She is very opposite of me.
Anyway – I gotta close up and get ready to leave work… I will be back tonight and read for awhile – I have been severely missing blogs!!! Ugghhh
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Thank you very much unfortunately I have a lot of problems with bad people, my blog page is no longer like a week ago, blogers can’t rate my blog, or my page Nilzeitung can’t find. ,,,, I still owe you a great team from WordPress … they managed it. I have to sort myself out first. Wish them all the best. !!>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>((((((((((((((*L*)))
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“He said let me just look at it first. Do not buy any part until I look at it.
I don’t feel very comfortable in this arrangement at all. I don’t like this one bit.”
His advice sounds very reasonable. Always let the experts check if any and what part(s) are needed. Usually wokshops by the parts they need from their suppliers and charge you after the work is done.
No reason to feel uncomfy … up to then.
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He is just a regular person, just likes cars. Not a shop
He likes me so I am just cautious and also I want to make sure is done correctly.
I didn’t feel comfortable because I want distance and do not want him thinking since he help me, I would give him a chance, or open that “door”
I’m just cautious.
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