Wed … nes… day

Ugh. My work day went really well … sorta.

I have work to do… a lot of work to do… so when you stop me from doing work, I am not being productive. 🤨

Omg so many fricken meetings … and don’t do them after lunch!!!! I just want to sleep lol … all they do is talk and make me watch their screen with things I already know or do not deal with??

Dude I have a ton of work to do… stop scheduling me for meetings!!! I am not getting work done and I am getting buried while they make me sit there and listen!!! Omg

I can’t do other work because this program will log me off if I try to do my work while there is meeting 🤨 and then the camera and stuff 🤨 dude 🤨

I do not like that!!

Omg my morning tmrw 😮 oh don’t ask. I have to rush out at 9am and grab something we NEED for Friday 😳

We called in a favor and this place took care of us… once again I know where to turn ❤️ yay ❤️ I am getting good at this!!!! ❤️ alright keeping their info ❤️ … I will send them something to say thank you ❤️they really got us out of a bind really fast ❤️ now I got your back 😘

It is me and one other 😮

Also – a lot of drama went down today?? I am not really understanding the drama very well?? I dunno – is office drama stuff ?? I just wish we could all be a team together ❤️ 🙏

And I am sorry … someone supported me, stood up for me, put me in my position … also I honestly believe what the corporation did to her was awful!! So 100% I have her back. She continues to be supportive and she is only one year older office manager than me. Freshly put in a position that was too much. So yes I will call the company out on that if they try to do anything.

Her funeral home struggles.

I don’t know why – that one is the cheapest of the 3 and always struggles

Mine is the middle – haunted mansion is your high end.

I’ll have this girls back if anything goes down – the company did her wrong. I’ll stand up for that. Absolutely. They were in the wrong with what they did to her.

And ya know… she needs support. They come at her really hard … let me help

So I don’t know??

Bring it.

I can also be fierce sometimes if I believe in something – but I have to truly believe in it.

But if I do believe in something and it is solid – yes I am fierce.

I am fierce but delicately

I am helping some people currently who were hard on my arranger but with me? Are very kind?

But my arrangers have to be fast… if you have issues or problems you come to me. I will spend the time and help you – if you need me to explain I will – I don’t mind – we can go line by line… I want to make sure we are all happy and on same page – if you need me to explain things – I can do that and I want to make sure the trauma of the death is not added to with the funeral. So let me spend time.

My arrangers handle the funerals / if you need beyond that – you get me.

I will stop to help… of course.

Anyway… I come off very soft (but again that’s if you are not the water heater guy lol ✌️) I am done with him!! Totally done!! Chapter is closed! Locked and bolted!! Lol …I never want to deal with him again!!!

I did not like him.

I usually have no issues with any one ever ?? Except for Satan and this water heater guy but the water heater guy – I think he is fine we just did not work well together – where as Satan has a black heart!!! 🖤 I wish that was cracked like the red emoji one!!

I don’t think water heater guy has a black heart – he seemed human. Just like a jerk though lol ✌️ ya no … I will stand up.. so you wanna come at me like a jerk – yeah I’m gonna be a bitch

Cause I will be damned now. Bring it. Come at me bro. This my location – you don’t think I will protect that?

You do me right, I’ll throw my business at you… and then some – cause I am connected with all my funeral homes …

But if you wanna come at me – then c’mon let’s go. Watch me shake – as if

So yeah – only Satan and water heater guy lol 😘✌️

But I want to point out something – I am strong here ❤️ because I am wanted – and I am appreciated… and I am protected.

So I am strong. I am supported in kindness … you have no idea. So there is that.

But with court I am afraid🖤

I really wish that black heart had a crack – I want it to have a crack right down the center

I am just really terrified of my ex – you also have no idea … the sense of fear is insane so just ya know … I am not strong there 😢💔

But here’s the thing with that… I may not be strong there – but I certainly have nothing to lose so bring it.

Never again will I allow bullshit. So if you gonna approach me – you make sure you come at me honestly and without bullshit. Then you might have a slight chance

I don’t play games and I certainly do not guess or read minds – you must be direct.

I do not catch on – everyone is nice to me… and I smile at everyone – so you are gonna have to step up if you want my attention

And then how would you do that? Lol because I am guarded so how you gonna get around that??

I have myself Fort Knox’ed in myself? How you gonna crack that ??

I don’t even know how to say to approach me… because when I think of it… my initial response is no…

So what can ya do? How does someone gonna get around that? I don’t know.

Someone would have to blow me away! I don’t know how you do that?

I am skittish with it too. I just have to observe demeanor and how they are with me I guess ? I don’t know?

I’m gonna have a problem with that – I am not sure how to fix that? or if can be fixed?

Anyway – that’s life right? 🤷‍♀️

We all carry our own cross 😘✌️

Anyway… whatever – what is meant to be will be… so whatever happens happens.

Just like death… at the beginning of February we were up against a wall / and now silence – a sudden silence??? Weird silence – kinda scary??

What should I brace for??

And they want to reopen. Ok. My hands are tied… so ok…

What is coming?? 😳 I am nervous in many areas and a lot tense… please do not have everything happen at once – oh god please!!!

So ok … just breathe

I wish I was smarter when I was younger – now I battle Satan

But ya know … the only way to be old and wise – is to be young and stupid lol ✌️whatever

Ok so last thing I want to say is – the weight of the world is coming down on my shoulders right now so… it will not be over until the end of March.

I don’t know how this is going to go… I hope, and I have protection – I don’t know how often I will be around in March – I might need to be here, but I might not have time? Only for March and then I am free ❤️ (I hope) … but I just have to ride it. Ok

That made me think of this song lol – I have always LOVED this song 😄😄

I have the cutest little dance to it too … which I torture my children with 😄✌️

They hate this song 😄😄 daughter thinks … hahaha I do not want to tell you what she thinks because I like this song – it will tarnish you on it lol

She thinks it sounds like burping 🙄😄✌️ she just tries to make me not like it… but your mother loves it ❤️✌️😄😄😄

My daughter is not at all fond of ANY of my music 😄😄😄🙄

Ok I should go – I didn’t really want to speak tonight but some of this made me feel better ❤️

I am a little stressed – March is coming …

I have a calendar on my wall… I stopped changing it when I lost my school job so it sits on March 2020

Last year March was hard … I am scared of March again

I will be back when I can – but I may need time ?? I don’t know.

Just tense stuff so let me adjust a little here and there and I will be back when I can.

I am about to be free for hmm… actually the first time ever in my life 😮😮😮😮

So let me absorb that and also … I go up against Satan so let’s see how that goes – let me breathe a minute. He terrifies me… it’s fine – I can handle I’m just telling you.

Ok Gnite ✌️

15 thoughts on “Wed … nes… day

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    1. Thank you ❤️🙏 I know… I will have it handled. Just panics me a little bit

      I am not very fierce there because I am afraid of him.

      I’ll get through it though and it’s almost over ❤️❤️

      … my nightmare is almost done ❤️🙏 I hope 🤞 thank you for the luck ☘️❤️

      Liked by 1 person

  1. I say Wed-nes-day too!
    I had a good day, pissing of Cray at every turn, but didn’t feel good about it today. The repercussion is going to be BAD!!

    I love Pony! Well, thanks to your daughter that might be past tense.. lol. I recall hearing that song and instantly downloading it for pole dance class… it was a “thing” to be the 1st with new music. I can’t recall whether I ever danced to it.

    The vid reminded me of seeing the Lil Nas “Old Town Road” video yesterday, for the 1st time ever. I just switched to a video channel (“Loop Party”). My new floor lamp can be music reactive but I’m too lazy to switch to that room. And now a DeadMau5 song that I like (“I Remember”). Sweeeeet… thanks for inspiring me to turn on music vids!! Oh, I just remembered that this was one of my “Rave It Out (between sets)” songs at the gym… I would start dancing like I had glow sticks and was at an EDM carnival, in the middle of the gym,trying to get people to join me. Fat old hag dancing with no one in the middle of the gym, not a care in the world – I still cherish what a brainF that must have been for the uptight peeps. What a great memory you inspired!!

    I’m sorry about BlackHeart and send juju for your ongoing safety.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hahaha – they made every child do that 😄

      Well she has to give you the info you need and you can’t be worried about what to do? That sounds just so bad.

      Hahaha yeah she hates Pony lol … but the child also hates Disney 🤨🙄 do not ask her!!! She will give you a full run down on why Disney is bad 🤨🤨🙄

      Just don’t – consider warned lol

      Wait what??? Your lamp will dance to your music?? 😮😮😮❤️

      See music 🎶 – we forget it but it is so comforting to turn to and familiar and memories attached ❤️

      I would have joined you!!! Totally!!! Wish I woulda known you – that would have been a blast!

      One time lol… at band camp … just kidding (I had to) but one time – I had gone out with a couple girlfriends one night lol

      Way way way before covid..

      We went to do Karaoke 🎤 because we were being stupid lol ✌️ well we were bored and in July decided to do Christmas songs to be even more stupid lol

      But then everyone else started doing Christmas songs too / and then we were done lol … too much Christmas … so we started it and left lol 😄✌️ ahhhh

      I’m excited to spark your memories ❤️❤️❤️


  2. Oh, I remember… I also fought the good fight on Wed, bringing up Qs from the China team, too afraid to ask Cray (or unable to get a word in) during a group call. Man, she attacked me HARD… cause she didn’t realize it was for them (making them even less willing to talk to her). I didn’t tell her. I’m waiting to see if she tells the boss.

    I found out a coworker told the boss something I had shared in confidence. And I think Boss told Cray. He had the best of intentions but the outcome has me fuming! A thing I do my accident (instinct?) is to share certain things with only certain people. The unintended result is that I know who leaked and can cut them off.

    And now I’m done threadjacking.


  3. Oops, I lied. I thought of you as I unfollowed somebody due to a combo of, “proud not to wear a mask”, “masks don’t word”, and religious comments. I was barely tolerating the constant God, He, God stuff; no mask was a deal breaker.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Pretty much everyone here wears a mask. In my funeral home – it is required.

      I don’t mind if people want to just be proud of stuff – that’s fine – cause I get excited with things too…

      Religion is just touchy.

      But for work I am ok… however the families are or want – don’t mind that at all…

      I don’t really understand the need to push religion?? I don’t get that?? Ok yes god 🙌 … yup, Catholic here so yes I am aware of god and things. I do it my way but I am uncomfortable to have things just pushed upon me… I also don’t like being forced. ✌️

      But I will tell you “Masks DO work” … let me say this… I got sick alot… I had the cancer and when through a lot – my body was weak… I finished my last surgery and boom covid so I have not been sick at all while wearing the mask – with the only exception of the second vaccine 💉 … but I didn’t catch that, I purposely got it!

      Otherwise the masks just work in general and so many added bonuses ❤️ more mystery, blending in ❤️

      So yes – I would say they do work.

      I feel naked without mask now, still can’t breathe but naked without mask lol 😷

      Some people just want some control over their own lives and don’t want to be told by anyone or any government what they are gonna do for their own selves

      Just curious… Republican? Do you know?


      1. I’m sure they’re Republican… an east coast, religious, anti masker ain’t gonna support Biden!

        Masks are the norm in Japan and their country less deaths, far less deaths, than Los Angeles county.

        Liked by 1 person

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