Wed … nes… day

Ugh. My work day went really well … sorta.

I have work to do… a lot of work to do… so when you stop me from doing work, I am not being productive. 🤨

Omg so many fricken meetings … and don’t do them after lunch!!!! I just want to sleep lol … all they do is talk and make me watch their screen with things I already know or do not deal with??

Dude I have a ton of work to do… stop scheduling me for meetings!!! I am not getting work done and I am getting buried while they make me sit there and listen!!! Omg

I can’t do other work because this program will log me off if I try to do my work while there is meeting 🤨 and then the camera and stuff 🤨 dude 🤨

I do not like that!!

Omg my morning tmrw 😮 oh don’t ask. I have to rush out at 9am and grab something we NEED for Friday 😳

We called in a favor and this place took care of us… once again I know where to turn ❤️ yay ❤️ I am getting good at this!!!! ❤️ alright keeping their info ❤️ … I will send them something to say thank you ❤️they really got us out of a bind really fast ❤️ now I got your back 😘

It is me and one other 😮

Also – a lot of drama went down today?? I am not really understanding the drama very well?? I dunno – is office drama stuff ?? I just wish we could all be a team together ❤️ 🙏

And I am sorry … someone supported me, stood up for me, put me in my position … also I honestly believe what the corporation did to her was awful!! So 100% I have her back. She continues to be supportive and she is only one year older office manager than me. Freshly put in a position that was too much. So yes I will call the company out on that if they try to do anything.

Her funeral home struggles.

I don’t know why – that one is the cheapest of the 3 and always struggles

Mine is the middle – haunted mansion is your high end.

I’ll have this girls back if anything goes down – the company did her wrong. I’ll stand up for that. Absolutely. They were in the wrong with what they did to her.

And ya know… she needs support. They come at her really hard … let me help

So I don’t know??

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Bring it.

I can also be fierce sometimes if I believe in something – but I have to truly believe in it.

But if I do believe in something and it is solid – yes I am fierce.

I am fierce but delicately

I am helping some people currently who were hard on my arranger but with me? Are very kind?

But my arrangers have to be fast… if you have issues or problems you come to me. I will spend the time and help you – if you need me to explain I will – I don’t mind – we can go line by line… I want to make sure we are all happy and on same page – if you need me to explain things – I can do that and I want to make sure the trauma of the death is not added to with the funeral. So let me spend time.

My arrangers handle the funerals / if you need beyond that – you get me.

I will stop to help… of course.

Anyway… I come off very soft (but again that’s if you are not the water heater guy lol ✌️) I am done with him!! Totally done!! Chapter is closed! Locked and bolted!! Lol …I never want to deal with him again!!!

I did not like him.

I usually have no issues with any one ever ?? Except for Satan and this water heater guy but the water heater guy – I think he is fine we just did not work well together – where as Satan has a black heart!!! 🖤 I wish that was cracked like the red emoji one!!

I don’t think water heater guy has a black heart – he seemed human. Just like a jerk though lol ✌️ ya no … I will stand up.. so you wanna come at me like a jerk – yeah I’m gonna be a bitch

Cause I will be damned now. Bring it. Come at me bro. This my location – you don’t think I will protect that?

You do me right, I’ll throw my business at you… and then some – cause I am connected with all my funeral homes …

But if you wanna come at me – then c’mon let’s go. Watch me shake – as if

So yeah – only Satan and water heater guy lol 😘✌️

But I want to point out something – I am strong here ❤️ because I am wanted – and I am appreciated… and I am protected.

So I am strong. I am supported in kindness … you have no idea. So there is that.

But with court I am afraid🖤

I really wish that black heart had a crack – I want it to have a crack right down the center

I am just really terrified of my ex – you also have no idea … the sense of fear is insane so just ya know … I am not strong there 😢💔

But here’s the thing with that… I may not be strong there – but I certainly have nothing to lose so bring it.

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Never again will I allow bullshit. So if you gonna approach me – you make sure you come at me honestly and without bullshit. Then you might have a slight chance

I don’t play games and I certainly do not guess or read minds – you must be direct.

I do not catch on – everyone is nice to me… and I smile at everyone – so you are gonna have to step up if you want my attention

And then how would you do that? Lol because I am guarded so how you gonna get around that??

I have myself Fort Knox’ed in myself? How you gonna crack that ??

I don’t even know how to say to approach me… because when I think of it… my initial response is no…

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So what can ya do? How does someone gonna get around that? I don’t know.

Someone would have to blow me away! I don’t know how you do that?

I am skittish with it too. I just have to observe demeanor and how they are with me I guess ? I don’t know?

I’m gonna have a problem with that – I am not sure how to fix that? or if can be fixed?

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Anyway – that’s life right? 🤷‍♀️

We all carry our own cross 😘✌️

Anyway… whatever – what is meant to be will be… so whatever happens happens.

Just like death… at the beginning of February we were up against a wall / and now silence – a sudden silence??? Weird silence – kinda scary??

What should I brace for??

And they want to reopen. Ok. My hands are tied… so ok…

What is coming?? 😳 I am nervous in many areas and a lot tense… please do not have everything happen at once – oh god please!!!

So ok … just breathe

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I wish I was smarter when I was younger – now I battle Satan

But ya know … the only way to be old and wise – is to be young and stupid lol ✌️whatever

Ok so last thing I want to say is – the weight of the world is coming down on my shoulders right now so… it will not be over until the end of March.

I don’t know how this is going to go… I hope, and I have protection – I don’t know how often I will be around in March – I might need to be here, but I might not have time? Only for March and then I am free ❤️ (I hope) … but I just have to ride it. Ok

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That made me think of this song lol – I have always LOVED this song 😄😄

I have the cutest little dance to it too … which I torture my children with 😄✌️

They hate this song 😄😄 daughter thinks … hahaha I do not want to tell you what she thinks because I like this song – it will tarnish you on it lol

She thinks it sounds like burping 🙄😄✌️ she just tries to make me not like it… but your mother loves it ❤️✌️😄😄😄

My daughter is not at all fond of ANY of my music 😄😄😄🙄

Ok I should go – I didn’t really want to speak tonight but some of this made me feel better ❤️

I am a little stressed – March is coming …

I have a calendar on my wall… I stopped changing it when I lost my school job so it sits on March 2020

Last year March was hard … I am scared of March again

I will be back when I can – but I may need time ?? I don’t know.

Just tense stuff so let me adjust a little here and there and I will be back when I can.

I am about to be free for hmm… actually the first time ever in my life 😮😮😮😮

So let me absorb that and also … I go up against Satan so let’s see how that goes – let me breathe a minute. He terrifies me… it’s fine – I can handle I’m just telling you.

Ok Gnite ✌️