What a difference a year makes …

…or a moment actually. What a difference every moment can make.

January 2020… I was still healing and I was working at a school with kids ❤️ I loved my job

I had applied for a 2nd part time job with funeral home at end of January and started first week of February 2020 … weekends only – answering phones and office things.

It was cool… I was little nervous because those were full services – that was right before covid. Like few weeks

March 16th the school said “do not tell the kids yet because parents have not been notified… but tomorrow March 17, 2020 will be the last day. 😮

So I had to know what was happening – and keep my mouth shut 😮 that made me feel sick… and I couldn’t tell them goodbye or tell them how they all brought me back to life, even if they didn’t realize it – so I had wished to thank them all for that. Those kids just accepted me from day 1 lol ❤️ and they made me laugh, they corrected my style choices lol, they were so funny and awesome … and the little ones were like my little ducklings they were so adorable

Everyday those kids made me laugh ❤️ they were bright and funny – hard on themselves but still bright with life – they just needed to feel important and heard… because doesn’t everyone

They listened to me because I listened to them. ❤️ Other people’s kids were pretty amazing

There was this one girl… freshman I believe ? Omg 😮 that girl will be president someday 😮 not even kidding – her presence and demeanor already!

And another girl was just finding her way to strength!! I hope she has stayed strong 🙏 I always think of her … she was awesome

All my kids were awesome

So yeah… I came back to life because of those kids – I could relate to them and I listened… I am compassionate so they were always really good to me… they used to make me cry sometimes because last Christmas the kids gave me presents 🎁 they were really sweet ❤️

I miss those kids – to think of them makes me smile ❤️ just leaving them was hard. That kinda broke my heart

So then I just had the funeral home. I was doing weekends all alone. So I would finish my work, and then complete whatever else I could find or knew how to do. I always noted and communicated what I had done.

Then they started taking me an extra day or so during the week… so ok … and I was still locked away so that worked

All spring summer and fall … I worked very hard and supported the team

And then it all exploded lol … omg … it exploded with cases and no staffing – everything!!

It went insane… and now here I am… full time full benefits and handling the entire office

I am very new – as in December new, at running the office with the accounts, reports and money etc…

But I’ve been handling the office and funeral homes generally.

I am also coming up on being free! So that is a big thing. That will be March of 2021. I feel sick about it though… I want to be finally free – but I am still scared of him, and I don’t trust the courts so it makes me feel panic.

But what will be will be. I have done my best. And he did not crush me. So whatever – he is soulless so it makes me fear him

So that will be finishing up I believe … then I can maybe move forward? Maybe? I won’t be at his mercy hopefully. 🙏

So I start 2021 in a fresh new position 😮… it is stressful because we are crazy busy!!!

Please stop gathering!!!! And keep your masks on – please wear those! Stay outside!! Distance!!!

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It’s just going to sweep everyone at this rate. Please don’t think it can’t happen to you or anyone you know… it does eventually

I would like to not get sick or die. And I would like to not kill anyone else. Ugh 🤦‍♀️- please listen!!

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What can you imagine a year from now?? 😮😮😮

2020 totally fit everything it could in there!! 🤨

And so… to 2020:

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See you can make songs fit quite nicely sometimes lol ✌️❤️

Ok I have to go adult and do things. I be back ❤️✌️