Be the little engine 🙏

So I had a little emergency yesterday… nothing life threatening or anything, and all is ok…

But my girlfriend had a surgery on Friday … she has always been there for me… and was there for me at my hardest moments, including my breast cancer – she is loyal … consistently!! Because of her, I am not totally terrified with things ❤️

I am also the loyal type. So whatever she needs… I be there, period.

She has 2 daughters and was having a hard time, I told her – you call me if you need anything at all – I will be there.

She needed help… so we packed up yesterday and daughter and I are staying with her and her kids for a few days, my daughter will be helping her today while I am at work.

I stopped at the store to get her a few things she needed before we got there… my daughter stayed in the car while I ran in…

At the checkout – the woman says to me… Oh my god! You smell so good, what are you wearing?! 😳😄 … I never expect that so I don’t really pay attention when I am choosing lotions or scents … most of the time I just grab whatever… so I’m like umm 🤔 what did I use?? Lol … I couldn’t remember what I grabbed – catches me off guard.

I usually grab whatever is closest lol … so I never remember which one I use. I don’t think about it. I don’t expect someone to ask lol … when I do “actually” pay attention …no asks me lol

Took all the kids on a walk yesterday afternoon – to give her some quiet time… her kids adore me and are like my own…

After our walk the kids all wanted to go in the hot tub 🙄 lol… fine whatever …

I did get a bathing suit but is a modest one… I just really liked it… it cover scars and fits amazing … looks amazing

I got this one…

My friend had warned me before coming to bring my suit so brought that one – way better than popping and having my scars on display which I am not ready for yet.

So I went to the bathroom to put on my suit lol… I walked out and the youngest little girl… goes “Oh my god! Beautiful!!! Wow!! Stunning – I love your swimsuit” 😄😄❤️ awww ❤️

She told me I looked like an anime character 😄😄 she kept going on and on about it…

Ok so good choice on suit lol ✌️ (she is 10)

I made dinner and got everyone situated – girlfriend is doing good – been busy though.

I am also preparing for Friday 😝😳 … please god let this week drag!! 🙏

Although… I’m thinking that I can handle it?? I am nervous and terrified and don’t know how to do this by myself…

But I’m gonna go in there – face Satan … lay down my requests and wants, and stand firm.

At this point – I’m thinking I can do removing emotions. I will stick to the facts…

I have been told not to say anything about the story unless asked. I will explain shortly here …

But I’m thinking – maybe I can actually handle this??? 🙏🙏🙏 maybe I can do it?? I hope so.

This week I have a law class for my funeral home on Wednesday and then this big major thing come Friday!!! Whew!!

If I can get through Friday and be strong – I’m gonna be so excited ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Please god, let me do good on Friday – please give me the strength to handle 🙏

“I think I can”

If you don’t know that story… it’s currently in my mind… this is the story…

youtu.be/5TPUwrURo6M

That story currently runs through my mind – so I think I can… be precise, be exact, state facts – no emotion. Must be void of any and all emotion!! No reaction. Show no fear 😳

Ok … “I think I can” 🙏 deep breaths!!

Ok it’s been little busy so I have to get to back work…

I be back later 😘✌️