The weekend…

Friday went well ❤️ it’s Friday – is like the best day of the week always ❤️

Work was good… I thought I would be really stressed because was last day to situate before audit?

But oddly ??? I was calm?? 😮

Just a peace? Cause ya know… bring it. I improve daily.

So we see. Plus I am excited to meet the person checking me ❤️

I know?? I don’t know what’s wrong with me lol 🤷‍♀️

Just does not sound normal ? But whatever – I am both nervous and also excited for audit lol ✌️

That is on Tuesday! So… alright here we go 😮 🙏🙏🙏 I’m pretty detailed with everything and save every receipt… have flawless records ❤️ so think I have it? 🙏

I literally document every single thing!! I am perfectionist in areas ✌️

I am same way if you tell me to plan a vacation. You might not want to do that if you like chill vacations lol … I tend to do historical or fun vacations – both of which I will have timed, and have options A,B & C … I highlight or write out important points of interest or history on. If is amusement park – I will map out the park and then see which rides are long lines – hit those first – I will have it all timed

So tiny little quirk in those areas ✌️ if just don’t ask me to plan then I won’t – but if you ask me… I’m going all perfectionist with it lol ✌️😘 details details details!!

I don’t know how to not do that?? If you plan it – there is no issue… is only when is my job to plan or do something lol ✌️

🤷‍♀️

I don’t have a middle ground in those areas ?? I do not know how to be medium lol ??

Either I don’t have control and it’s chill – or you give me control and I plan 😮

I do like peace and chill lately though – have not planned a vaca in awhile? Since before cancer so been a long time.

Maybe I am more medium now?

Anyway… got home and as I am walking from my car to my door… that neighbor guy comes walking out in boxers 😮 and says hi 🤨

I said hi back and quickly rushed off because no! Yes I am weird like that.

Don’t come say hi to me in boxers like that!! Omg!!! So yes I am weird that way – highly uncomfortable

Bathing suit or shorts fine … just not underwear – k? I don’t wanna see nothin!

I find him weird and uncomfortable – very creepy – I’m sure he’s fine … I’m just saying

Kids came over – we had dinner and laughed about things…

Oldest show me this YouTube channel where they argue over foods…

Like chocolate chip cookies or Oreos 🤨… or ice cream vs cookies 🤨

Ok whatever we see… so he show me lol …

Ok well I was almost instantly bored – just 2 regular guys arguing over everything.

Ok ya know. I’m good – plus who cares? I don’t want to spend my free time listening to people argue over dumb things.

I must be very old? Because I am just not catching it??

See??? Is it me???

I have enough here listening to people argue all the time – if you turn on news is nothing but conflicts!! Over everything!! I do not need to here more on simple things.

That’s just me though, others must enjoy that for there to be so much?

But whatever – then we played this really cool game? Mangaka?

We had 3 cards with our obsessions lol… whatever the card said. We all had different

Started with 2 panels and was easy… but then 4 panels and then 6…

You got points for adding your obsessions and including trends into your cartoons

They all tried to form story lines …

But not me… I heard the instructions for earning points so I just made very random and weird comics lol 😄❤️❤️

I won with double the points of all of them 🙌❤️ lol

They all had these elaborate stories and comics that had a storyline 😄😄😄 but little points cause they didn’t hit all the point areas!

I hit every single point area lol ✌️❤️ so I enjoyed this game

My focus was the points not the comics lol – “perception” lol ✌️

It’s all how you see/hear it lol 💋

Then this morning – country boy … well let me rewind the story about him for a minute …

All week he been texting and sweet? He doesn’t pressure or anything? But just saying hi and stuff

I get the feeling that ?? I don’t know?? That he is at ease with me in bigger way?

But ya know, people have spurts …so I didn’t think much of it. Whatever.

Lately he seems more relaxed with me even after I laid out what I want?? So I don’t know what to think about that?

He’s sweet and good to me, but we are different – and we don’t always understand each other

I am a communicator – but also silent lol ✌️… he is not really a communicator but is more actions?

I just get the feeling lately … that he really ready for something? ..but I don’t know? That’s not like him… but I’m getting that feeling?

This morning even – he texts me “good morning beautiful, have a great weekend”

So I don’t know? He’s been doing that.

I’m watching his motive.

Very recently… I tried to push him away. Just because ??

I only want him there if he gonna be sincere and actually wants same – if he doesn’t then what is the point? He’s not really in my life and my life is busy… so is his.

So I laid it out – I said if you don’t want that it’s fine. But then you are not meant for me.

And then?? I don’t know??

He changed and then been attentive?

He is not used to women like me… he is used to them the other way. I am effort. So is weird he putting in the effort.

He knows about me going silent. He knows how I am. He recently spoke to me about not being so silent

He can say or think what he wants, it is not his decision to make. I have my reasons

I am not silent with him. I tell him where I am with him.

I am not sure with him. The thing that gets me with him is that he has an understanding on something that is important to me. He understands me in that one area. So even when we can’t understand each other in other areas – it is that which keeps the strong connection?

I can not have anything that isn’t what I want – so if he can’t do that or scares me with that – I can’t.

No matter the connection.

So I don’t really know what’s going on there? He’s suddenly putting in effort?!! What is that?

I look like his type – but I am not his normal type. I do not look the way I am supposed to look for who I am. Not that there is a way you are supposed to look – but my looks do not match who I am lol ✌️ (yes I know – whole other discussion lol)

I have known him for 7 years so I do know him. I know he has a soft heart and protects it the same way I do.

I am just not sure how to process him?

Ok well I have to get to bed

Just spend entire day having fun with daughter ❤️❤️

I have to go to bed though!! Very very late for me!!!

Goodnight 💋❤️✌️