Moral stuff ??

I have a moral question? But I am not sure how to ask it yet. So just be prepared because I will ask ✌️

It’s a sensitive heart ridden subject?

And I am not clear with my thoughts on it yet.

On one hand I have severe loyalty and love – but on the other hand my heart bleeds with it… so I am trying to decide how I want that in my life

Not an easy decision. I am quiet because I am thinking.

I feel really strongly… if you are not in my life strongly, like you wanna be there … then there’s the door 🚪 don’t let it hit you on the way out

I have a really hard time with that one. I feel that way very strongly… you either wanna be there or you don’t.

I ride that hard ✌️

So … my moral question won’t be easy.

When I had cancer – not only did the doctor tell me I had to give up my life, but he also said he wanted all toxic people out and anything causing me stress

Ok well… there really is not a way to not have some of that?

I do keep most toxic people out – but what if one is family ? What do you do?

What if your own love and loyalty is strong.. do you allow the toxicity?

So I have a danger point… it rides those lines – you either wanna be there or you don’t…

At what point is it not ok? At what point do you say?

What if who this person is means something to you? Deeply? What if to turn your back would break your own heart? Would you do it?

If was just any other person – this person would not be in my life …

They are there because I love them with all my heart

Is only who they are to me and how much I love them, that I cling to them and allow it

So… my moral question is gonna be around this.

I guess, I can sorta silently ask?

Do I break my heart to save my soul? Bleh! Lol … is that my constant lesson?

But it does break my heart and it is heavy and I don’t like being silent within my inside private world. I can not have that collapse so…

I don’t know quite how to think of this or how to handle.

You can not just give me quick easy answer / please remember this is someone I love very much and is someone I am loyal to and I wish to not lose this person.

But is toxic to me. So it is hard for me to keep my mouth shut. I do most of time, out of respect, but when they cross a line, I don’t.

So… how do you handle that?

It is not cut and dry easy. This will ripple the lives

I love this person – but I don’t know if I can keep them in my life? Today I told them “if you don’t wanna be in my life, then don’t.” Bye 👋

That is my danger area – if you hit that spot that is dangerous

I am not sure what exactly I want to ask? I don’t want to lose them, but at the same time I don’t know that I am ok with them in my life??? So that makes my heart bleed! 🩸

I have to do a few things but I will be back this afternoon to read ❤️

Little silent or a lot ✌️

17 thoughts on “Moral stuff ??

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  1. Hmm, that IS a tough one but look at the language you’ve used … Do I break my heart to save my soul? I think the honesty and seriousness of that gives you your answer! Wishing you the very best of luck! Hey, maybe some folks will surprise you and change their behaviour, or at least adapt it with you 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Their behavior won’t change, because they don’t care, and they have no reason to change …they are like that with everyone not just me.

      They only care about themselves and what is in it for them.

      It’s just that it is family so makes it harder. I have loyalty there and who they are to me too. I love them so much… but again they care about no one else but themselves …

      So we had words and I said if you don’t wanna be in my life – then don’t. You are free to leave. And then they back stepped 🤨

      They know my loyalty with family.. so they know if I say that… I am serious.

      I don’t ever cut family off because I watched that happen growing up with the older generation.

      I feel like if they wanna be in my life then be there – if you do not then don’t.

      But I’m not going to deal with toxic or jerk. I would do anything for them … but if they don’t wanna be there, they can distance then … do they want to do that? So we see ✌️

      I don’t beg anyone to be in my life – you want to be there – then do that. I only want to enjoy life – either you with me or not

      Isn’t it funny ? I describe myself as soft lol … gentle …

      But I do have areas where I am tough ??

      I have one guy friend who makes me laugh all the time – he is straight … but I every time I say well “I am soft and gentle”

      He always says “the F you are” lol 😄😄

      That’s only because I won’t go out with him but it is funny how he says lol

      That is because he sees my guarded side lol ✌️

      But anyway – is difficult with family – but I also just want a good enjoyable peaceful life so either you join me or you don’t.

      I don’t want anyone thinking that they doing me any favors – don’t do me any favors.

      So yeah I have little danger area there ✌️ they should be careful with their steps.

      I learn life new now so – ya know. I learn 😘✌️

      I carving my own life – I love them, I want them there … but again don’t do me any favors – you wanna be there, be there – if not don’t

      Yeah I’m a little hard ✌️😘 I personally don’t find it hard? But whatever that’s my opinion and their choice

      Liked by 1 person

      1. This makes perfect sense!
        There comes a point when enough is really enough. You realise your worth and respect that, so, that is a positive 🙂 Of course, it will not always be easy but, sadly, few things ever are. Good luck to you!! 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

    1. ❤️ I know thank you for that ❤️

      Is hard because is family. So I try to hold on. I love them very much

      But see the previous response I wrote to Bon Repos Gites …

      I don’t want to lose them but if they be toxic it is hard.

      I have made family ❤️ that is true

      It’s hard because again family and loyalty – I am devoted to family so it’s just difficult

      But I also take a hard stance with if you want to enjoy life with me or not… I am very hard in that area

      I just cut slack because is family and I do love this person very much.

      If was anyone else I would not deal with. They would be done… I love this person so I hold on and allow

      But today we had words with stuff and that’s where is

      Like

  2. I would be very clear about where the lines are drawn and what I won’t tolerate… and stick to it… walk away, hang up, or whatever if they cross the line.

    YOU have to put YOU first!!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Joel changed my life for the better. I loved him far more than anyone or anything else. He taught me, “Never let ANYONE treat you as second best!” The hardest thing I every did was walk away when he started treating me like shit. I still wish I’d found a way to resolve the problem but I didn’t.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. We have to cut off all the toxic relations, even if that person is a family member. The most important thing in your life is your happiness. Just ask yourself, “Does this person makes me happy ?”
    If your answer is yes, then keep that person in your life. And if it’s No, then cut off that person then and there.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Well that is true… and I do that … they do make me happy to have them in my life because is family and I want to keep family.

      I can handle them generally and do love them being there… I love them very much!!

      I will cut them off though, if it becomes too much for me to handle. Which does kill me a little to think of.

      So either way will be little difficult 😞

      Liked by 1 person

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