My moment 😒

Alright so… maybe possibly struggling somewhat today… everyone has their moment right? Ok. My moment is this moment … I’ll be fine – just saying, having a bit of a moment.

Ok… so I love reading all your posts… the informative ones, the fun ones, the uplifting ones, the ones that make me see other perspectives or interests… so love all of that – keep doing! I need that! It helps ❤️ I love being with you all.

I have little bit of panic and overwhelmingness today… just cause … I have to go to the store – I don’t want to… I’m afraid … I have to but I’m afraid. Shhh 🤫

I’ve been pushing off and pushing off … but I can’t push off too much longer.

And it’s just exploding all over here in the United States … I stay away from news as much as possible, I still get alerts on my phone – you do have to know what’s going on to be safe. I don’t do social media just this…

So… I’m having slight panic when I think – ok I have to go to store … whew! I don’t want to… exactly how long can you live without food? Lol ✌️ can we do that? I have read there are people who live on sunlight (lol) how do I do that???

But I don’t wanna go to the store – I feel terror with that. Whew ok shhh 🤫

Just life right? Ok… sometimes in life you have to do things you don’t wanna do ☹️ … I don’t wanna do this. I never thought it would hit me so much?? But it does.

Anyway… being a wuss.

Ok so… get in the car… drive to the store… Oh my god! … ok get out of the car – go into the store … run and grab anything that’s left – don’t breathe … and get the F out!!

I don’t mind going to work because is only me there… I see literally no one!!! Just on the roads and I am in a steel cage with wheels lol

I don’t know if I have the umm?? What’s the word I’m looking for?? Balls? Lol … to go to the store at this moment – I might have to test my waters first ?? I dunno all of it kinda scares me and I’ve been isolating so it just makes me nervous.

But then I have a side of me that is like … suck it up!! This is life – handle your business 🤨 … I want that side to shut up!! Lol – I am trying

I’m trying to take my mind away – but I have to go to store… so that looms over me

Dear lord please let it be ok. I am afraid.