
That photo was taken in Lake Tahoe – which I lovingly refer to as “my peace” place… when I was married and it was really bad… I would take the kids on day trips to Lake Tahoe … I would take them to the beach or hiking or something educational … my favorite was hiking and finding beautiful peaceful places like this with just no people around and you could just soak up the peace to recharge for awhile.
I still look at that photo and can instantly feel and remember. The beauty of Lake Tahoe ALWAYS takes my breath away. ❤️ Just looking at this photo, I can feel the peace from those moments – this is one of my favorite photos ❤️
And then … The next 2 photos are me… these are from my first surgery which was about 8 hours … there is kind of a funny story to them, but also wanted to share how amazing my kids were through all of this… They think I have strength? These photos make me remember what they did for me ❤️
I am not recognizable in either of these photos (well I don’t think I am) .. so it’s fine… the photos aid my story lol…
This first photo – was taken right BEFORE my first surgery… no make up they said… no lotions, no perfumes, no deodorant, no nothing (I love all those things!!! Ughhh that killed me!!) I also wasn’t allowed to shave prior to my surgery either!!! Something about germs – whatever – I listened 🤨 … didn’t like any of it – but I listened …
They prepped me and got me warm and comfortable … then we just waited for the Operating Room …
That’s when I took this photo… I was ready and waiting… I posted this photo to my friends and family to keep them all updated … right after this, I went into 8 hour surgery …

Then 🤨… being completely drugged up and just finishing an 8 hour surgery … still to this day I do not remember much about after… I can remember very tiny bits and pieces … most is told to me… I was completely out of it for next 3 days … however immediately after waking up in recovery… they gave me my phone back 😮 – I do not remember that…
I evidentially took THIS photo and sent this out to everyone lol … OMG!!! Looks like I got hit by a truck or something lol … such a difference to me… before and after!! I know is surgery and was 8 hours – plus I was not really there … but still is just crazy to see these photos

Well… that photo right there – after surgery…
Ever since I did that… they wouldn’t let me have my phone after any of the following surgeries lol… when I was incoherent… kinda a good thing …
But my kids constantly laugh and tell that story during holidays … about how I would say “I’m the parent, I’m pulling the parent card – gimme the phone” nope… they didn’t ❤️ … or try to somehow get them to give to me … I don’t remember any of it… but…
They protected me from doing things when I didn’t know what I was doing ❤️ they were very good to me… once all the drugs wore off (usually in 2-3 days) … I would be back to normal…
These kids had literally taken down date, time, and amount of meds I took, and took my vital signs, and all of it… they recorded my temperature and pulse … everything – they even helped me with the tubes and recording the fluid, as well as changing the bandages ❤️🥰❤️
When I saw the paper that had everything recorded in their handwriting (mostly my oldest, but also the other 2) I was just touched by the care and love ❤️ I had always loved and cared for them – and then here they were doing for me ❤️ I was just impressed – I still am… (I saved that paper ❤️)
I do find the photos and story kinda funny. I don’t remember any of it except that first photo … luckily there are no other photos after any of my other surgeries … now I just don’t bring my phone lol
But not only did my kids take care of me after surgeries… they also protected me ❤️🥰❤️ I do realize how incredibly lucky I am in so many ways… I am alive and I have these kids ❤️
Anyway… never give a camera phone to someone freshly out of surgery lol
I do love photos – usually I don’t like them of myself – Unless is preserving a memory which I guess you could say that about these 2 photos …
Thank god there is no video!! lol
Gnite ✌️
You look exhausted in the after pic. I wake up from anesthesia with an attitude problem. I don’t know if I’ve ever expressed it (never had anyone around) but I know I’m usually really really angry for awhile.
You look amazing in your before pic. Very much like the mid-30s age I had guessed.
I’m glad you’ve had the support of your kids… and kept the paper!!
Tahoe is beautiful but I only think of the time, as a kid, that our trailer got infested with huge red ants.
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I don’t remember how I am in recovery – takes me awhile to fully come out… my kids say the first thing I do is ask for them. They said right away I kept asking for all of them and then they would be there and I would ask for them again… then ask for my phone lol
Yeah I look a lot younger than what I am. My mom always looked young also. I am not that young – even the kids at my school keep thinking I am young lol
I want to have that paper framed and hung on my wall ❤️ is very special to me
Oh yikes lol … the fun of the outdoors!! Red ants are the worst!!!
I am not a big bug person either lol… I have long hair, so sometimes a hair will fall on my arm and I jump thinking it’s a spider 🕷 lol
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I’m okay with most bugs now but those big ants freaked me out!
I used to look young for my age… prob because fat filled my wrinkles. But around 50 my jowls “fell” and now I look even older than my years!
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Well I definitely feel slower and older now… maybe cause of all the trauma? Still look young, but I can feel the “age” creeping in… I am very tired.
I deal with bugs when I have to, but do not like California’s spiders 🕷 on steroids – they are HUGE and California has scary spiders!!! Black widows and brown recluse 😮 bleh!! So yeah not a spider person lol
Plus I am in country so all kinds of weirdo bugs!! 😳 … I sometimes make the boys get them for me – and I should probably by stock in big spray cause I have big MEGA jugs of it lol … nope not in my house lol
My daughter is a bug-a-phobe lol… way worse!! 🤨😒
She calls me when I was getting off work and tells me there is a black widow in the house 😮 …
Ok I’m on my way home, but I’m still far away…
And she’s freaking out… so I told her go to neighbors house and have her help you.
So neighbor goes over while I’m coming home as fast as I can and it was a … daddy long legs 🤨😑
So 🤨 yeah we do not like California bugs lol – New England bugs were normal size and not scary – I could handle those lol
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My aunt was a cop and had a friend call her at home, all whispers and freaking out. My aunt assumed there was someone in the house but her friend was freaking about a spider and asking her to drive over to kill it.
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Lol … that’s hilarious
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This is the only spider, a HUGE CA Jumping Spider (I learned later) that has freaked me out (major trigger warning)
https://leendadll.wordpress.com/2016/04/25/the-actual-mega-spider/
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😮😮😮 yeah that’s would freak me out too… I probably be calling “my” police friends as well lol
That would definitely have me panicking!!
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I tried to kill it with wasp spray (long
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… long firing range but was out. I went door to door looking for more, with no one understanding how big the spider was!@ finally killed it with Fabuloso.
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Lol… whatever works is what I say
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You do look young and beautiful. And I love seeing your freckles. ❤️
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Thank you … well I have always looked young… at 21… looked 12 🤨😄
Now that I am 47 is nice sometimes – but I get mistaken for younger all the time with everything.
Yeah can not escape the freckles either. Lol … there are just sooooooo many…
When people ask me if I have tattoos… I say “nope, I do not… I have freckles… connect the dots, erase, repeat” lol
I do hide the ones on my face usually with make up… but some of the darker ones still show through 🙄
Thank you though!! 🥰
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I love this blog, it was so heartwarming to read!
I love how your kids took care of you and I love how you all are able to laugh and be happy especially in these times.
I’m glad you’re better now! ❤️
(And your comment regarding how you’ve always looked young, I completely relate to that. I’m 21 rn, doing my post graduation, and I look like I’m in 8th grade, lol.)
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Thank you ❤️ not always easy – but I hang on lol
Well it is nice looking young … especially now when I’m old… sometimes I get frustrated with it for reasons lol… but I do like it for most part. Don’t think I really “want to” look old lol
But I’m sure eventually I’ll look old… I’m almost over the hill so we see lol
Ps I was 20 when pregnant with my first – Looking like a kid still … so that was fun
Now if I go out to dinner or anywhere with my oldest, people think we are a couple 🤨😠 lol … I do not like that!! I tease him and say I’m just gonna make a shirt that says “I’m his MOM, NOT his date!”
He doesn’t care, but it bothers me. It’s humorous I guess … but I still don’t like it.
Even people I know say I don’t look old enough to be his mom. I suppose it’s good. It’s not bad lol
I just want to look grown up sometimes lol ✌️
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