So let’s see …

One of my flock wanted to buy a new TV… but they are not tech literate 🤷‍♀️

I am only partially tech literate – otherwise I have a 29 year old who does all that for me also 😄❤️ … so I don’t have to be. 👏👏

He helps me with my flock too ❤️ {{ He is MY son… I teach him empathy ❤️ }}

We went over about 11am and we moved the furniture to center where was gonna go… then my son brought tv in from her car … is her very first smart TV 😮 … she was only living on a DVD player … otherwise no tv 😮 she less TV than me 😮😮😄😄😄

Until now 😄😄… I’ll probably never see her again 😄😄 she be so sucked in to all the channels and all the things to watch for free …

He set up and connected the TV to wifi and set her up with Pluto Tv

The tv people wanted her to also buy a Blue Ray Player 😮😮 … omg is that still around – I laugh – because what? No you do not need that!

They said she needed this and that – no she didn’t

Would have been $500 over price of TV – I said no – just do the TV … then they wanted to charge her $250 for delivery and installation and would probably send some incompetent guy who wouldn’t take the time

So I say no… have them put it in your car and when you are home – you call me and me and my son come over and help

So we did

https://youtu.be/MVSLU6zFYf8?si=2oh7TD-eJVf9IN4z

He laughs ❤️ because he’s like installing and setting everything up and in the meantime, me and her were talking and laughing – sometimes similar to Laurel and Hardy 😄😄 she reminds me very much of my mom ❤️ and we laugh just like that ❤️

It makes me think of my mom – and then she calls me honey sometimes – she doesn’t realize it when she does it, cause she told me a story about her husband and she always called him honey… so I think it just slips sometimes ?? But “honey” also reminds me of my mom ❤️

https://youtu.be/v1VbOQPxpSU?si=7rMkcx0Jq9CNe9Zp

❤️❤️

On rare occasions at work – I so busy and I am used to speaking to my family or kids – I accidentally be on phone with coroner and be like “bye love you” lol 😮😮😮 because I am going too fast and am not stopping to think right – is habit 😮😄😄

https://youtu.be/piOIvNO2M8Q?si=DcITTvarM_7_JmIl

😮😮😄😄😄 I try to be aware but sometimes I say that if I am being fast … oops 😘

Oh well – whatever 🤷‍♀️😄😄

Then – I decided “let’s go and try to do stores myself”

I don’t like going out to stores – I live here and serve the families here and now everyone knows me from before and now… so I prefer low under radar profile ✌️😘 I want to have peace when not work – I don’t want to be noticed … I would make a terrible celebrity – I would hate that

Waiting on invisibility cloak ✌️

Anyway went ok … I go to Home Depot because I am doing a repair on a toilet 🚽 – all by myself watching YouTube lol 😮👏 I learn things lol – so we see 😘

Then I ran to pet store to get my man’s food … that was hard because that is heavy – I struggle on that too.

And then finally grocery store – also hard for carrying things … but also went ok. Wasn’t anything too heavy.

Was full day – I got home at 4pm

https://youtu.be/9rlNpWYQunY?si=v_9WOFLNO5OQNuGi

So about the guy… he is so present … he makes me feel like I’m so important and does things to brighten my day, my world etc 😮😮

Friday he show up at 9am at work with a Starbucks coffee for me ❤️❤️ awwww … I couldn’t chitchat – I had to run because my meeting was starting – ugh 😩 meetings 😩 whatever

Anyway – Friday was INSANE!! BAM 💥 I totally needed that coffee!!! So bonus points on that 👏👏

Way to brighten my morning – nice – thoughtful… and even remembered what I drank … so pays attention ✔️

Also – is very thoughtful in his actions and words

Ok so far … I like that

He makes sure I am happy – wants to make me happy 😮 I am happy person anyway, but he puts in effort to make me happier 😮 … and makes me feel like he thinks he’s very happy to be in my presence 😮😮

So far … that is how you do it lol … but that’s just the start … so actions and words and things are good… but I don’t know the life he has or type of person he is. I am still learning that.

But he makes me smile and laugh all the time… sometimes when I am at work he just sends something funny or if is not funny is something sweet

He does not overwhelm me with texts and we both busy people … so that works too

I do not get any bad vibes so far …

He seems like type to actually have relationship and not some booty call or something

He is different than I thought would be – but ya know still learning

https://youtu.be/1Vt-yPAeZKk?si=3H7R08RUEaPjNiQB

I’m ok with it – because usually I am not… but for him yes because of his sweetness, thoughtfulness, he’s supportive, cheering and kind – also funny

So ok continue lol

https://youtu.be/jGflUbPQfW8?si=MX03pQgtqwEgoADx

Only because he being so different – he seems real but we will see

He is capturing my attention – so alright – we see

I am extremely cautious and weird here … I’m just gonna observe

Is new … am cautious – newness wears off so we see – just how is towards me is like this:

https://youtu.be/FM7MFYoylVs?si=2HBJSUqUSLG448j0

So hopefully he does not fuck it up – we see

But I think he is good hearted person OR he could know that I am and prey upon that – so don’t fuck it up … I don’t see him doing that – but I’m just sayin lol ✌️😄😘

https://youtu.be/zDo0H8Fm7d0?si=d8Mjt_RscxapajQ8

Who knew 🤷‍♀️ a fricken politician/lawyer lol … totally not usually in my wheelhouse lol

I am tough on stupid shit or sleazy pompous assholes

But he’s not that

Currently I like him… he has my attention … alright boy – can you hold it?

https://youtu.be/jH1RNk8954Q?si=Kb8xlA5PAbIYcBV_

https://youtu.be/SxGLPVvNjvY?si=Kw2LgiJRb5pp4mDt

Ok so I will be learning things – ahhhhhh 😳😳😳😮

Oh my goodness 😳😮

Ahhhh finally Friday! This week went fast though!

So. I’m still not sure what to think with guy? I do like him, I do not get a bad vibe – seems very sweet hearted ❤️

Enjoys texting but not overwhelming … and was nice to see him last night for dinner – enjoy his company 😊

Maybe I say careful because I’m so used to being on my own and that freedom ? 😮😮😮 did I get addicted to peace ? Lol kidding sorta – how much do I like that? 😮

I don’t really know myself in this area – so that’s another reason I say “careful” lol ✌️

But he’s sweet, very kind and thoughtful towards me and actually acts like a gentleman

Says funny and also sweet things, convos are awesome cause if I talk to him we always talking or laughing very simple and easy

Sometimes I think I might make him bit nervous – but I also think he really likes me, so that’s why… I am quiet and sorta reserved in that area – because I am observing

As a “love” he would be …

https://youtu.be/2Vv-BfVoq4g?si=yxiYqsbqtaqmp7mA

Cause he acts that way 😮 just like that 😮 he has a romance to him – very sweetly though, and since I did know him before – a long time ago… as just acquaintance he smitten??

We can talk about anything, and he’s so supportive

It’s his humanity I am watching – cause that’s a thing for me – I am also gonna watch how he handles anger … cause I haven’t seen that yet

I can’t really tell – he has a softness to him with me… is that with others too? Or just me?

I don’t know him well yet … he can tell me whatever he wanna tell me… but I don’t know him or his life …

So I am just seeing

If I trust him as a man – he better sure as hell be strong enough to trust a beautiful woman so we see

Are secure enough? Or will that be issue?

So just observing

So far is nice

I am little afraid of having any relationship because the peace I have is incredible – I answer to no one but self ❤️👏 you begin to love that and I have been on own for few years now

But then I would love companionship … I think? Not sure?? 😮😮😮

I don’t really give it too much thought 😮😮 omg

Who AM I? 😮

But I do like that he trying to connect with me… he is present … and makes an effort without totally overwhelming me

He does step carefully and very sweetly

I guess the thing that scares me is how fast people just are ??

I am pretty and have a body … so … not that it’s a bad thing … but ya know … “todays world” – can be little superficial – sorry but yes

So I am looking at motive too, and morals – who is as a person.

I think he is good person – but we will see

So if he is actually amazing – what do I want?

😮😮😮

What if I don’t know??? 😮😮😮

I don’t really feel lonely ? I have my kids, and work I care for many… is full life- I don’t have loneliness

But I do like him and do enjoy his company – so we see

I am a little afraid of myself in this area …

So yes – careful 😮

https://youtu.be/CqBtS6BIP1E?si=j9Wnl9rvkr9xFDcd

😮😮😮 I dunno if I am ready for stuff

But I won’t pass on someone amazing so we see … so far he’s doing really good

Careful though …cause I go silent if overwhelmed by anything I can’t handle – so we see … am I ok?

He knows I have that silence so maybe he hear me? But I don’t know – don’t go to fast – I am afraid of myself with the silence

I’m pretty, look younger than I am, and with a body… so going fast makes me nervous

I am nervous that THAT is what fall in love with

Yes I get attraction to cause the initial draw for some …

But do you hear who I am?

So we will just see many things one way or the other

He acts like this :

https://youtu.be/L6-uJLteKek?si=F7GFRl4EOFU_S6Ls

Since we knew same people – he has asked about me before – he said he asked and back then whoever he asked said “yeah she’s hot but married”

Ok so what do you see ? Me ? Or hot? Which one?

But yeah always learning lessons – I will see because he does seemingly have a humanity to him – so ok … I’ll give a chance – we see

https://youtu.be/Bx51eegLTY8?si=mQ3MBjuJ_mzpj-r6

I am nervous also of me? The silence scares me cause I don’t want to hurt anyone ever with anything!!

So just step slow and let me see

But I do like his kindness, sweetness and effort toward me… he is like this:

https://youtu.be/im8yO-CwqFE?si=yVeyf5ru7jKfL0sL

I just wanna make sure is right reason too

So alright – I will learn things 😳

Let’s see how this goes 😮

So I booked my imaging for my breasts – so that’s scheduled for about 2 weeks from now

I tried to schedule the blood tests – but everything was automated and fuck that – nope 👎 live person or nothing … so I guess that one is nothing

Nothing you can say will change my mind – if you a medical professional – then be present – if not …you a quack and I’m not gonna deal with that.

So that’s a NO

Whatever – I’ll go do the breasts and take it from there … of course people are present when it’s about breasts 🙄

When is about anything else – computer automation and fuck that shit – no no and no – I do not join the world with that… be present or I’m not dealing with it – whatever

It did not let me speak to someone so nope 👎 I’m good

So I’ll do the breasts, since they were “present” and spoke to me and tell me things … blood 🩸 yeah screw the automation shit – I’m not that type of patient ✌️ take your automation and shove it!

So there is that

And then secondly – I give up … if you try to come close to me, I am the type – I say whirlwind … because I am full of life and I am present – also like I tell you … I have a life spirit 🙌

https://youtu.be/vUdloUqZa7w?si=2B1xJJnwK0De5nrH

So you just can’t come close to me.

But I like him – and I don’t really want to admit this, but I do trust him… he’s very sweet thoughtful and kind

He knows about my medical things, my satan things and little bit with work … and tonight he said you are just the way you are because what you experience, but whatever you need – you just say the word.

Also… he speaks to me real? Is different

He’s kind and has a good heart – which I am surprised by … only because of his professions – which I don’t like or trust lol 😘

He is former politician turned lawyer lol … I do not like either of those lol … both are slimy professions … you can not have a good politician or a good lawyer … and by that I mean morals and human kindness – but he does ?? He’s not dirty or a liar

He went through a lot too as a politician … cause you know – people be brutal – I am brutal with that, cause usually they suck 😘

And lawyers – don’t get me started – dirty dirty dirty – yeah I’m calling lawyers out – but also politicians – sorry – what I experience ✌️ dirty dirty dirty

But he isn’t – or doesn’t seem that way yet

I’m still watching, I still have guard up because I just want to make sure is not manipulating – since is a former politician turned lawyer … but he does not come across with an air about him. So ok – we see

Anyway… he has fallen so we will see what happens

https://youtu.be/QyVLAjabUGE?si=_Cj65yjlJlg48c8T

https://youtu.be/UeyRvNFJgL0?si=q4v43-T3W1LWcVRO

Careful – if you think you can come close, you better have heart – or don’t bother

Don’t fuck it up

So we see – welcome to my life

https://youtu.be/YBcdt6DsLQA?si=rgKwvS5WrGiQxLzb

https://youtu.be/TUVcZfQe-Kw?si=2NttBsce9vIpggW2

Careful – I levitate 💋✌️I am that type – I make you wish for that … why I always say “careful”

I make you feel alive when you are around me – I make you feel life – I have an excitement that is contagious 😷 wear your mask lol ✌️

Like I say – life spirit

Whirlwind 🤷‍♀️

I even tell him about the quiet 🤐 cause that’s a weird thing – but you should know what comes at you ✌️ I will go quiet if is too much so step carefully – one false move – ya know?

I knew him from a long time ago … when he was a politician – but only as an acquaintance, I didn’t actually know him and at time I was still married to satan… our conversations are easy … and is like being teenagers ? We laughed alot – we went to dinner tonight – he would not let me pay for anything

Anyway.

We see … ya know … takes time

https://youtu.be/8tI1_KlO6xI?si=g6ZKlb1QiBeeokoO

❤️ thank you for your music Boy George ❤️ I love all your songs – not that you read this … but just incase lol ✌️

My parents bought me Colour by Numbers (btw it shows I spelled color wrong lol) 😄😄

Well my DAD LOVED his songs

At the time we had a brand new Pontiac Firebird with the bird on the hood – electric blue with gray interior

Every Sunday we would take “Sunday Drives” lol and he would pop my tape in – and BLARE it!! Lol

I would slink down in the seat so no one could see me lol … cause omg my parents can NOT be blaring Culture Club – but they did and loved him – I do too … beautiful music – beautiful memories thank you ❤️

https://youtu.be/JmcA9LIIXWw?si=Qj_zXq7NTNoqQYMZ

It didn’t matter who were or what looked like or anything else – the music was awesome ❤️ thank you ❤️

https://youtu.be/2nXGPZaTKik?si=_GZjFOp-c1EPbJJs

https://youtu.be/hFVuuRxM2VU?si=7YfCyV1NU6kKuhWx

https://youtu.be/YewVugPHon4?si=FF1Iyd9x9ZbEtRNa

Ya know what – I will just end up playing that entire album ❤️😄 because I don’t want to stop lol

But one more thing before I go to sleep …

This morning – we all got yelled at because of something that my market has issues with – I had never seen that before 😮

But later in the day – someone called me from corporate.. but they were calling for my coworker – not me… because they were installing something

But when I was the one who answered – they seemed nervous but very sweet – seemed a little afraid ?? You don’t have to be scared of me at work lol – was cute though ❤️

She was very professional and did not vary from her job … so I stopped her and said “hey thank you for all you do” cause they help us…

My coworker was out so she had to call back and told my coworker about me lol 😄😄 and my coworker said “yeah she’s really sweet and helpful”

But I kind thought that was little sad – just because I only said small little words .. but the world doesn’t usually do that… so it made impact ❤️

Be present with people – you will see

https://youtu.be/5B1QTEGL3t0?si=izxZDtoLzsYwSZis

Let’s start with the bad so I don’t have to deal with that…

Something is wrong – but I don’t know what?

I don’t really want to know – but I do – because it scares me

I am better to focus on others – that is MUCH easier!! I am way better at that!!

I do not like when you turn the spotlight on me 😝 I also don’t like to deal with medical issues 😭

It was very traumatic – and I can not handle the emotions when it comes to myself. So is very hard

I can help with your emotions all day long … I get comfort from your comfort ❤️

I do not like to handle my own emotions – they are too much.

Anyway…

They run some tests already…

They check for diabetes – I asked them to run that one because that runs in my family – autoimmune diseases – my Dad’s mother had that… and all grandparents had high blood pressure

My blood pressure is fine, they tested for diabetes – I do not have that 👏👏👏👏❤️❤️❤️❤️ I’m thin but I don’t know if that matters ? I had them test because runs in family and I googled and self diagnosed self with things that say I am dying lol 😘✌️ so just to check lol

I also work in the death industry so… I see dead people 😳 … it makes you think a lot …always – because that’s my every day

And then stupid life keeps throwing things in my face – both with life and death – stop that ✋ don’t make me think of bad things that can occur

I am all clear on diabetes and my blood pressure normally is always low… they did blood pressure test just because they always do that … I am ok there – I am regular as always

My symptoms are weird – something is wrong- sometimes I am ok – sometimes I am not? For maybe 2 weeks something be really off?? My body is acting weird or different? And it’s more and more

So they wanna run tests to rule out cancer, thyroid issue or breasts – so let’s not make me cry – don’t comment on this part … just read

Just let me vent and get it out but then don’t make me cry 😘 I’m weird like that – just listen

People just simply wanna be listened to sometimes

Just let me – we will move on to happier items 😘✌️ that is better … I need that balance 😘✌️ I can’t do those emotions well so just let me

https://youtu.be/CD-E-LDc384?si=ZKfO7oZ5qmdzl_Is

On the way there, I was complaining the whole way – because I don’t want the focus on me – I don’t want that

And my daughter – was just telling me reasons to 😩

So I said … if no one is around and a tree falls in the forest lol 😄😄

And she said “mum that is so dumb – even as a child that made me so mad – of course it makes a noise”

It is very funny though with her reaction to that 😄😄

Ok … moving on …

Let’s talk about something else I don’t like to talk about lol … dating

This should be fun

Anyway, so… I’ve been talking to this guy who wanted to take me out on Sunday – at first I was not too sure because I had reservations because number 1 … he is a a man lol

Sorry but yes a little concern cause I don’t trust … in todays day and age I don’t want to deal with the stupid shallow shit, or the fluff – come original or don’t

https://youtu.be/KWo-02Hsab4?si=LUlWsIkCowWiYm1W

A total stranger today – did NOT know what I do for work… that I am aware of

I was not at work, I was in a store … but he just struck a conversation with me about his mother and how she died and why

He has no idea what I did for work – he just say those things – this actually happens a lot 🤷‍♀️ I must have a vibe??? Plus I am becoming known and remembered, so I dunno maybe he knew what I do? I do wear black all the time 😄😄🤷‍♀️ not by choice – out of respect ✊

Then told me he needs to work on his health both physical and mental … he said he has low self esteem because of what he went through

Be who you are – do not let the world define you. The right people and things will come to you when you are secure for yourself

Be original – not a copy … be proud of who you are. Do not let the world or anyone else define you 😘 only YOU define YOU ❤️

I have trauma from what I went through so I work through that – ish 😘 slowly … so that life gets mad that I go to slow, and then pushes me 🙄🫤🤨

Anyway…

Ok back to the guy who is flirting with me 🤷‍♀️

So ya know – I am quirky with things – I severely watch your words and demeanor – I also listen to your stories and observe you – if you gonna come around my life – I WILL know who you are

Well right off the bat I had concern because of what he did and does … I do not trust the professions he has had. So ya know … watching him lol ✌️🤷‍♀️

I am severe with that

But I like him 🤷‍♀️ he’s not a pompous Asshole so far

Just learning who he is…is kinda fun. He’s very funny … very sweet

I said “I am older”

He said “no, I’m pretty sure I am, how old do you think I am?”

Hahaha well 40’s lol

And he says “yeah but late 40’s”

I said “still 40’s” … so I was correct lol

He says “why how old are you?” Lol

I have him beat by 2 years – so he said I rob the cradle lol … no … careful with your teases lol

But I like that – yes play with me – made me laugh

He makes me laugh a lot – he’s sweet and kind

So far

But he says all the right things and has been keeping my attention which is usually NOT a thing

I usually focus on my kids and work only, once in a blue moon I will think ok maybe is time? … but then it is always the same, so I just don’t bother … I have own happiness and peace… so whatever 🤷‍♀️ …

But he is a nice distraction and we clicking at this moment

I am still guarded because his professions have silver tongues … also think they read people

But perhaps you could say same for me – but MY profession SHOULD actually have caring, empathy and compassion

His professions are not known for caring, compassion or empathy

I am extremely hard on BOTH his professions lol

But so far he isn’t a jerk… so alright – so far am enjoying the convos – he’s fun

He says hi to me every day, and I like that he shares but then also asks me things … I really like that he shares first then asks something

But again – those professions … so I’m watching if he just learns me and then tells me what I want to hear – so I am cautious

I gonna be watching – one false move lol ✌️

But he seems real when speaking to me – he even said when he speaks to me it makes him feel young

I do have a brightness and a young ness of heart lol ✌️ I brighten death so isn’t so dark… and I can make your spirit feel a little younger sometimes 🤷‍♀️ I lift it 😘

I have a life spark ⚡️

https://youtu.be/p47fEXGabaY?si=75nXOe-yoPjmcq0t

Careful 😘

I am a life whirlwind type if you get too close

Also here is something else I pay attention to – be careful how fast you move – I severely watch that too – that will make me watch your intentions, as well as question why moving so fast?

Sorry but I am never ever ever again having a satan so … hell yeah I gonna watch how you are

So bring it – we see

Enjoy his convos but also have caution – that’s just gonna be how it is – but he does well when walking that tightrope lol … so time will tell – always does

Also- I’m independent so don’t be thinking I am damsel in distress

https://youtu.be/jH1RNk8954Q?si=cXcrqxWC10yhLSLP

Be a gentleman, and you be fine…observe and listen also

But I am tough … so ok – we see

https://youtu.be/J5qWnG5RQTk?si=cj3koxEgfYYXENKB

So ya know – put those songs all together and there you go 💋 that is me lol

https://youtu.be/T3E9Wjbq44E?si=Z6pmQ9uhuFS6osw5

I have to do something I don’t want to do…

I am worried.

Is best to just do, if don’t I continue to worry

I feel like damned if do but also damned if don’t – so which one is better?

What I have to do will make me severely cry, only because of circumstances which I will explain later

I will have to face one of my demons 😩

I always say if you don’t face they forever haunt you. Bleh 🤮 sometimes my words SUCK!!! 😬

Ok so – about to do something that hopefully goes well – but I’m really scared 😭 I don’t want to

But if I don’t that is also scary so I don’t know which is worse

Don’t tell me it will be ok – cause I don’t know that

Maybe not comment on this just yet – let me get stable with it and do this and then I be back 😩 let’s just see what happens

Ugh I don’t want to 😩 but it’s time

And even life is throwing down signs 🪧

Ok whew – deep breath 😮‍💨

Someone is coming with me ❤️

😩😩😩😭 I don’t want to do at all – I just have to

I hate when life forces things on me 😝

Ok I have to stop and just do this so ok – I should be back later 🙏 😭

Ok – big girl panties

https://youtu.be/mZ6VezKMoRY?si=9ThCA8CG9Ey9haS7

Ok well… life just broke my stride 😮

I am not feeling well – earlier I was the sickness where you feel so bad, you just cry for no reason lol 🤷‍♀️ I came home take meds and sleep

I’m still weird – I probably gonna stay home tmrw and take Covid test 😩

It’s about to get real at work 😮

Please let it run ok without me 🙏🙏🙏 but good lesson to see what I do

Get ready

https://youtu.be/Ejdx6_hYTiY?si=j1nXzpmBmt1rhSJS

It will be fine – but I worry very much – I don’t know that they will take care of like I do 🙏🙏🙏 ok holding my breath on that one 😳 it will be fine

I am nervous 😟 I am never sick 😩😩

Ok well whatever – gonna let go – handle without me for minute 😩

https://youtu.be/nxMMElT61A8?si=4tAFAJN-WJXBGos0

Ok and then I have other thing to talk about 😳

So… Sunday someone wants to take me out – to catch up and stuff

So ok sure – I say yes

Then he text me yesterday – and he’s funny… but I’m still reading him- seeing how real he is

Yesterday I was thinking what am I doing? – this will just be same as always – why I think it be different?

Cause I will think ok maybe this be different and it is never different lol 🤷‍♀️ so what am I doing?

Yesterday… he was funny on text… but I still can’t read him on text yet?

What he does for a living gives me caution – not sure how to see with the professions he has – because I don’t trust those professions 😮✌️

And then he texting today and again making me laugh … he’s very funny 😊 so that’s good

I’m trying to see if the humor matches mine? Or is that gonna be thing because I have a quietness and a reservedness sometimes too – I have funny playful side but also a more serious subdued side

So whatever – we see … he’s interesting, seems like nice person so I will see

I take my time to know though

Proceeding with caution still – I am just telling you what is happening

Ok well … time will tell

😳

I don’t see how will go yet – in person and time be better for me to see clearly

https://youtu.be/wIft-t-MQuE?si=oogeXv-oI9EBWw2q

And I might have to cancel Sunday if I am not doing better 😮

Ok well I go in and out – I’m hot/cold, strong/weak, with it/not with it… my body is little achy and and my head just disconnected – my eyes feel light ??

No fever – I keep checking when I am alert

Doby does not understand why I am not same as I always am … I am very slow moving and not all playful currently – am dragging

He is very disappointed with that

I DoorDash’ed him some treats because he really is such a good boy … he deserves some goodness not sickness

He hears them come to the door – so I have to distract him and put him away so I can get the package

So I get it and then let him out and he’s so excited and knows it’s for him 🙄

He jumps like a bunny rabbit with excitement which is cute and funny – but I try to make him not do that because I worry he will get bad hips

But he jumps away

https://youtu.be/nh71sZmtRLU?si=YIFxR1IqS8pdYt96

https://youtu.be/nh71sZmtRLU?si=YIFxR1IqS8pdYt96

He’s been sweet and loving while I am sicky ❤️ he even sleep with me earlier ❤️

He trying to take care of me ❤️

But anyway – he saw the package for him – jumps up and down with excitement

And he happy with new bones and then let’s me be sick and stays right beside me

I went to get more water and he takes his bone and follows me to the kitchen lol … dude … I’m just getting water and coming right back lol

He is definitely a Velcro dog omg lol

And amazing protector and he’s very family oriented and likes routines, he makes me laugh and is so happy to see me always

He’s funny and sweet and caring and loving 🥰 ❤️

I just never imagined to have a Doberman breed- now I can’t imagine without ❤️

That video is totally him! ❤️ they are very very smart dogs 😮❤️

Ok I am fading pretty fast right now and just took some meds so I need to sleep now

I hope to be back at some point 🙏 hopefully just a quick sick bug and be done 🙏

Please don’t be Covid 🙏😩

Btw – my mind over matter did not work at all

Something very nice happened to me today 😊

I was appreciated – so that was very nice 😊❤️

https://youtu.be/Ns-n87Vflvs?si=XzEIggB52f-8nU6R

I did not see that coming at all 😮 so I was too stunned to react – and was nice 😊 … almost a tear to the eye lol 😘 … did give me a big smile – thank you – that was nice – I appreciate the appreciation ❤️

Death somehow never wants me to leave, although sometimes is a son of a bitch!

But I kinda really love it…it’s a love hate thing 🤷‍♀️

Sometimes it gets to you. But it definitely teaches you strength

And there are things that make it worth it. ❤️

There are quite a few things

https://youtu.be/fqzhtvLWefA?si=-pnwE1uzK6qHzsYj

So also… today someone asked me to hang out on Sunday 😮 ..not my flock 😮

Is fine, is someone I used to sorta know? Only from work things way before funerals

I have to say I am highly suspicious of any motives – but that’s always anyway lol

So we see how this goes. If that goes

I am not sure what I think about this – but we see

I am also feeling little rundown – hopefully not sick- I can NOT be sick!!! So let’s hope not 🙏🙏 I going to do mind over matter, so let’s see how that works lol ✌️🙏 I should be fine

And one last thing …

https://youtu.be/L_jWHffIx5E?si=4BmKp9_5FsH4rYSi

💔 soo young …

Rest in peace ☮️ 🙏❤️

https://youtu.be/LQj–Kjn0z8?si=1s-FG9tcT_3uZsCY

Thank you for the fun music 🎶 ❤️

https://youtu.be/0mYBSayCsH0?si=OsTzuN7TpGWdUZNn

Well I have a new dog issue lol 🤷‍♀️ 💧

So someone USED to be just like having a Velociraptor … we are out of that teething stage and he has melted into the family now.

BUT now… he just wants to hug me, and lick 👅 me always lol … which sounds all great, but little dude has MUCH saliva 👅💧 and is kinda big and solid for me

Ugh

When I come out of shower – I like to lotion up and smell all nice and be all hydrated lol – like a flower 🌺 lol – also need sun ☀️ …but shaded because am delicate with sun ✌️… but I like to be all lotioned

Plus I don’t know if you have ever gone through life just constantly being licked? 👅💧

Anyway – he licks all my lotion off and then I’m all slobbery 💧😝 I feel gross after constant slobbery licks

Sometimes when I walk in the room and he is on the couch being all good and looking all cute … I will just go over and kiss his head – just couple quick kisses 💋💋💋 lol …. But I swear mine are NOT slobbery! Nor open mouth 👄 just sweet little NON slobbery kisses to say I love you so much lol ❤️

https://youtu.be/m6pW_q1PvH0?si=Xn2Y8oZ8gyR-tY-r

So … I think his licks are his I love you’s – it’s just ugh slobbery constant licks 👅 💧

https://youtu.be/vRXZj0DzXIA?si=o6Xx1g_wGgimhlDm

He likes to be with me at all times and I am the one he come to, to feel love and protection like a mom ❤️

There are times if I sit – when he wanna hug me – ok fine … go ahead, you may hug lol … but then he’s gotta be all up on me and snuggle in my neck type stuff … oh buddy… you can’t do that – watch the chest – you are not little

So we are working on that, cause boy is solid – I am not

But he has to constantly lick me – constantly my legs and my arms if he has a chance for those

Dude … ewww

Ok I love and appreciate all his love – but I can’t have so much licking and slobber 👅 💧

It’s not bad thing so I don’t want to scold him – but teach him maybe not to do so much?

I would like to smell nice and not be all slobbery?? Ewww

Ok so how to teach boundaries with licking ?? 😮😄😄 omg 🤦‍♀️

This is so funny, how do I make it less ? 😮🤷‍♀️ we play all the time and he’s my little right hand man

He has wonderful sweet funny personality ❤️

It’s just all the licking and slobber that is getting little much? Boundaries lol ✌️🤷‍♀️

Ok so how do I teach that?

I know is his way of saying I love you to me ❤️

https://youtu.be/qAFg2TQk9v0?si=8ecDuQgx5Kqrq3uS

Lol

How do I not be candy and teach him some chillness with that?

Yeah so I will have to figure this one out

He’s not velociraptor 🦖 anymore … now I have licky monster 👅💧

The velociraptor stage was fun

But what do you do for licky love stage? Seriously 🤷‍♀️ … it’s increasing little by little

I can’t believe I am writing a post about how to make something not constantly lick you lol … SOME of the problems I face – I swear life has a sense of humor too ❤️

https://youtu.be/3rYoRaxgOE0?si=WJbYe5DPFjI2YMXS

https://youtu.be/otCpCn0l4Wo?si=VnL9QFnJplHjngUL

😄✌️💋

https://youtu.be/Gs069dndIYk?si=bOtkT7fJlcuswwKR

❤️

I remember that song because I used to answer phones when I was younger for a doctor, and his name was also 3 syllables and one night someone sang this song and changed the lyrics to his name 😄😄😄

Party on … Dr blah blah blah

😄😄😄 it was hilarious ❤️👏 so I hear that song – and think of that Dr 😄😄… but also September 😘✌️… I think of the 2 versions when listening to this

Whew – august was a month and very long!! Ughhh and now we are in fall 😐

Winter is coming 😳

I’m https://youtu.be/gxhknGARGt4?si=dsonaScYeB4Drasj

😩😩 ughhhh

Is cold overcast and rainy 😝😩

Ughhh – I am warm blooded lol – ugh

https://youtu.be/E1fzJ_AYajA?si=yfGSTFKifZZ51VgR

You can tell who the transplants are 😄😄 … because if a Californian is born and bred here, they mostly love or appreciate winter 🥶 😮 🙄 … which yes I do also appreciate “some things” I guess – I’m sure if I try I could find something 😘

If you are a transplant from a cold state … you usually don’t like winter 😄 ..people from Massachusetts usually retire to Florida 😄 …we don’t like winter lol

Ok well – have to do winter 😝😐 ugh

https://youtu.be/TxrwImCJCqk?si=Ew8uUkChv1tyXUKY

Ok – this is little early but ok – but hurry up

Yes.. I was the kid who would ask are we there yet? 😘✌️I will try really hard to keep the winter complaining to a minimum – as long as 2023 does NOT go all in 😐😳🙏

Mercy – please be good and quick

So now I count down til December 21st because that is when I know I have made through winter and will begin to subside in a month or 2 – hopefully NO crazy weather rivers please 🙏

Ugh ok winter – I will try not to complain – I am definitely – without a doubt – a summer person! Need heat and sun ☀️

https://youtu.be/wbfgVEk-mxQ?si=VUQGew3Mg3oTl7ZJ

I do like that song lol – yes … and I do not like below 60 degrees lol – and that’s even pushin it

https://youtu.be/F57P9C4SAW4?si=o7vqZqq0PlHepjHH

Golden Coast still has a winter though

Ughhh summer – are we there yet? 😮✌️

https://youtu.be/Kr0tTbTbmVA?si=XhNMEdD2R7NBFHNk

Ugh I need to change the subject!!! Cause it will keep coming …

So sometimes I watch a documentary on interesting things … or if I am trying to learn something I just search whatever that is…

And then sometimes kids are here – and they will show me their shows or things lol

Well – Doby has learned what a tv is 😐… today is rainy cold and overcast, so he come to me and look at me… then looked at tv lol … so I said “you want me to turn on the tv?” … and he licked his lips – that is his yes sign 😄😄😄

We communicate 😘✌️

https://youtu.be/aatK_l9Yuyk?si=ra3b5TlrNfg44pJM

❤️✌️

So I turn the Tv on and he’s like a little old man 😄😄😄 🙄 … but he likes certain videos lol – he likes the lawn care videos 😄😄🙄

He sits like a little old man 😄😄, he talks back to the tv like a little old man 😄😄

Look at technologies reach 😮 … my dog likes tv lol – but actually he always has

It is funny to see him want tv 😄😄 usually I have it off lol – he’s like human 😄😄 but with fur

Also – I was gifted a box and inside this box is handwritten recipes – they look like ones my grandmother or my mom would do… all their favorite recipes or things they wanted written down

Even the handwriting – it looks like my grandmothers ❤️

One day at work someone said to me – how do you write like that? I have beautiful nice legible handwriting – is nice writing ✍️ very pleasing to the eye lol …

I said I dunno? I just do why you ask, that is weird question?

They said every generation has a writing style – recently I have been seeing that lol

Anyway… I will share some … I have looked through briefly because I’m all excited 👏

Is someone around my mothers age – because there are also cut out recipes in there from McCalls 😄😄

Some recipes I know or like or would try…

And some recipes I do not know – or would not try lol ✌️ – I still share incase anyone out there would like those 🤷‍♀️

I will pick a recipe soon

I also got 2 very large cookbooks from ages ago – I remember them from my mother ❤️

https://youtu.be/0UIB9Y4OFPs?si=1AbeJ1ia_KCUk969

Anyway – 🔜

Also… I have a lot on my mind. With a lot of things – I am sorting thoughts 💭

That was a rough week!

Ok I have a lot to do at this moment – but I do plan to be back later today … we are on Sunday and I have tmrw off for Labor Day 🇺🇸

As long as work does not go crazy!! Should be fine 🙏

Ok back later

https://youtu.be/ulJBJYie0l8?si=kjeDMtUPBL14cEP3