Soā¦ remember money bags lol
Basically I laid it out ā¦ I told him that I have a job that is very demanding – I work a lotā¦ is a job like you have never known! Is crazy sometimes
Also I have children and they are number 1 ā¦ period – so letās just make that clear.
And then also – my motherā¦ so ya know I am highly sensitive with thatā¦ and any time I save – is for her
So I tell him thatā¦ and I tell him that he didnāt even give me moment to respond while dealing with all that, before thinking was some kinda problem
I just canāt deal and I donāt date so Iām not used to someone in my life – is pressure
ā¦ I say all of it
And he say – he not want to ever be burden to me, and was sorry for being impatient, but he says he was impatient only because we have fantastic time when together. He loves spending time with me and taking me places and seeing me enjoy things.
He also wrote a novel telling me how much he loved my laugh and being with me š®
And then said ā¦ he just want whatever time I can give him, he can be patient
š®š®
What I do? š®š® whoa š³
Omg – this is why I stay away from all people
So ok ā¦ now you see why I just dive into work – not only do I love the job ā¦ but also ā¦ this stuff lol
If I just stay away and work all the time – I have no problems / or very few and I can handle that
But then I be out in public and speak to people and these things happen
Hmm š¤ Iām a little speechless how well he handled my barrage of shit lol
I donāt know
What do you think? Omg
Ok with kids now – bye š
Learning Life 
Hey Trisha, it’s not so much what we think, but what you think.
There are a few possibilities from this … 1] what choice did he have to save grace after your ” barrage of shit” except to say what he has, 2] more importantly ask yourself if YOU want this – l mean if this was really the ONE you would know and move mountains to make room for everything you WANT in your life and 3] is anyone really that patient? I mean how long is the proverbial piece of string especially in the game of ‘oh l can wait’ for you and when you are ready give me what time you have ………….?
I was trying to put myself in Moneybag’s shoes and see things from my perspective.
What would l be after if l was him with the financial resources l have at my disposal? Would l really truly madly deeply want to wait on the premise of maybe only perhaps time with someone l like? Would that wait time be worth it? What is the end game? What am l looking for ultimately in the waiting game? Friendship? Compaionship? Relationship? Sexual Partnership? Marriage? Mistress? Would l be wondering at my later age in life if l want to keep waiting on someone even if younger, but with the barrage baggage of commitment or should l be looking elsewhere for someone who does have freetime available more readily? What do l want from this woman?
Then if l was you l would be asking myself – what is his end game? Why me? More importantly WHY does he want to wait for the possibility of something on the never never of time. Do l want someone in my life right now or ever, afterall l am ‘not a stone’, but l do have many life responsibilities/ Do l really want someone in my life that basically says ‘oh yes whenever you have the time, or do l want someone who will work harder at getting the balance right? BUt, am l THAT interested in this man enough to make it work?
That’s what would be going on in my mind if l was him or you.
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Damn, you are good!! š®
Well, what would an older man want?
Cause he say he wanna see as much as possible before his time is upā¦
But then he also say he can be patient and wait for me when I avail
But then he wonāt get to see what he wants if he waits for me ā¦ so??
What is that?
How you see that?
And then for meā¦
Itās really fast
I do enjoy time with him. I do have fun with him – we laugh a lot
But Iām not overly feeling comfortable and the way he professes things or say thingsā¦
He just doesnāt actually know me.
He knows the life of me, in terms of how I am with life and how I interact with lifeā¦
But he does not actually know me or my life.
Heās sweet, funny, treats me wellā¦ but Iām just slower
Maybe is fastness? I donāt know
I just donāt know if I am ok with having someone in life – I donāt have time to really give someone.
And Iām not so much the type to date – is way over my head
I have direction with my job and work very hard to do that.
And then ya know I just have many things
I canāt keep up with traveling all over the place – is nice to want to do – sure
But I just have a lot
I dunno
I respond more later – I have to work – short staffed āļø
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“What is that?”
“How you see that?”
Well, l’ll tell ya because we are mates š
I am an older guy, not as old as MB, but older than you and younger than him. What would l want?
My faster days from young are gone, so l would want to get to know you entirely or as entirely as you’d allow me, so for me, it would have to be friends first. But of course, it would be a slower trek because of your justified hesitancy, given everything that has gone on in your life and that you still have children at home and older kids too, plus a hectic schedule for life and work. But l would still want there to be some fire.
Respecting your boundaries is absolute, but I’d wait for you to come to me on your terms if anything more on a deeper level was wanted. Till that point, l would tease and tickle and flirt but work it only on a friend’s status first.
If l approached it on a friend basis and cared for that only, then the respect and trust would build up as l got to know you and you l. Hell, it might be that we would only ever be friends or flirtatious friends and never anything else. I would be the friend that was a little bit naughty or close to the edge with you, but you’d be okay with that because you at least would know where we were as friends. You’d eyeroll at me and think, “Oh, that man!!” But you’d be okay because we have trust and friendship and we talk about anything under the sun without worrying.
But Moneybags is different. His approach was way too fast, and whilst l understand that he likes you and wants your young outlook in his life, something wasn’t – isn’t ringing true with me or, more importantly, you. You can’t put your finger on it directly, but some things are nagging at you, and l think it is his fast approach.
You like things to be slower-paced and orderly in so far as ‘actual’ pace.
That’s what l make of it.
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Well I just had an epiphany š®š®
I know exactly what I want and when too fast – I canāt get that
There is my hesitation. I see it!
I tell him all those thingsā¦
And while he say words about how he thinks he feels about situationā¦ and that doesnāt want to be burden and says words you want to hear – that someone enjoys being with you – yes absolutely ā¤ļø appreciate that totally
All that is really nice ā¦ but ā¦
He does not know me, nor I himā¦ I am just learning
And itās hard to juggle. Iām exhausted by stuff
Does he care? Cause thatās what I wantā¦ someone who actually cares but can understand
Does he care what makes me cry or what causes me stress?
I went through so much ā¦ so I donāt want to waste any time ā¦ I wasted time before to be with someone who was satan ā¦ lost years for that – and he said words to make me stay – yet didnāt care at all.
And I am also not getting younger and should enjoy life and I want toā¦ I would love to share life with someone and enjoy it
But I want them to care – actually care ā¦ about how feeling, what going through all of that – no just can I spare my time
He does not know me enough to care. He move too fast.
I dunno how to explain well.
Also because of what went through – I am not just handing over reigns ā¦ I need to absolutely trust someone
And Iām not ever bowing down to anyone or accepting shit behavior or anything bad – I am not going through things again, only stuff that life makes me š¤Ø
Alsoā¦ I donāt know ā¦ but remember that post where people were mean? Well I was looking for help and we were in a Lull – lulls are bad because that means no one is dying ā¦ is bad because after the lull everyone dies all at same time!! š³
Here comes winter
So see ā¦ itās gonna be hard for meā¦ especially in winter
No one gonna be ok with how I work. Time will be their issue with me currently.
He is far away from me – very very far
Is hard for him to even get to know me ā¦ but he doesnāt try much on text just speaks about when can see me again or when I can do something ?
Not getting to know me, just interested in my time
So ā¦ must be caring š
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Yes caring, l agree.
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I was just giving your conundrums some further thought whilst in the shower – hahaha that reads funny, what am l doing thinking about your conundrums in the shower anyway? “Hey you sure have some nice conundrums!” Sorry the Aspie mind was having a play with the word … anyway digression aside..
The very nature of your personality Trisha is that you don’t do things by half, you are either in or out. It is also one of the very striking aspects of your astrology sign – cancer – but also female cancers are very welcoming personalities which is why others are drawn to you as they are – because ‘you bring the sun, the warmth and the light’ all at once. You are an intuitive person – you’ll always know what you ultimately ‘ want and l think the truest question is that as much as you ‘loved’ the attention is this man what you really want?
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You are so funny – I do same things – is where some of the best ideas, thinking and singing talent occurs lol šāļø
Well it would be about someone coming in my life where I am HIGHLY protective ?
And yes my personality is extremely welcoming and empathetic.
I think my last answer hit itā¦ attention is great and seeing things amazing ā¦ and I understand what he say about life and taking moments to know life – yes I understand.
I just have a lot in my life and I dunno – I want the right one and want someone to care
I do not see that, only what he wishes for. I do not want to hold him back from having life, but is huge pressure for me to take off and enjoy life when I have so much life going on!!
I care for others – I care for my kids and my mother and other peoples people ā¦
I know people do not have same heart as me, and thatās fine
But I want someone who cares about my heart soā¦ you have to just know me for that
I think he would add too much pressure to me, and I would stop him from having the life he wants and seeing what he wants.
So I dunno
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… and there you have your answer Trisha š
You have answered it yourself š
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Haha yeah but had to talk it out š
Appreciate šā¤ļø
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You are always welcome – it is what friends do – we help talk the crappy through š
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Lol ā¤ļø yup š
That was very good, too bad you donāt do the mental health field
Informative, also seeing the issue, and redirecting to me to figure out choice lol
Very good š š
Thank you again
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