So… CB… hmm 🤔
I’ve known him for many years… 7 years.
He’s very sweet, thoughtful and kind to me. He has always been that way with me.
He has always had a level of caution with me though – I just notice because of how careful he is with me. I am same way with him.
I think we are both careful because neither one wants to get hurt like what had been done to each of us … so we just cautious with each other
And he’s respectful and caring too… he was in my life before my dad passed – before everything 😮 before my cancer – everything…
He would give me small escapes from those heavy things ❤️ … take me to baseball games … or teach me something I didn’t know, or help me get over something that I feared ❤️ he’s pretty amazing because of that.
He is or was… careful with me on a few sides though …
First because I am a woman … he has a past where 2 women really devastated him so … he is/was careful with me . Totally get that!!!
That is the same way I am, because of Satan so … I understand that
So whatever… I just enjoy time when I get to see him… we are both cautious … he’s very caring and really sweet – he never lets me pay for anything food, gas whatever … he is macho man with that lol ❤️
And I constantly tell him what I want so he is aware… and I want to do that, because I need him to leave me alone if he can’t handle it. But he never does. He actually seems to be coming in closer 😮 ???
And one time – the first time I laid it out for him – exactly what I wanted … it did not match his
Ok well …no matter how much I like you, if that doesn’t match… I’m out ✌️ because what’s the point if you have different things you want ?
So I went to walk away and he didn’t let that happen 😮 he totally did not let that happen 😮😮
And then he went kinda slow and cautious …but amp’ed up his communication with me 😮
I had never went to walk away before – I just don’t want to have meaningless crap – and if we can’t match then there is no point.
I just was kinda silent and going about my own things … then he started texting me in the mornings…
Randomly saying sweet things during the day 😮
… and I just noticed him kinda being more umm?? Putting in “EFFORT” (notice I put that in bold lol ) …like he didn’t wanna lose me 😮
He told me he wanted to try to see me this weekend lol … when he say that now – I just think “yeah ok, whatever” lol
Because 🤷♀️… yeah … ok … whatever
I knew wouldn’t happen.
But I also know what he’s doing, so I’m not bothered by that … only that he keeps saying “I wanna see you” lol …stop saying that!!! Show me your actions then lol …
Let me clue you in…
I can say words all day, but unless I do what I say I will… they are “just words” so 🤷♀️ yeah ok whatever
I’m fine if you just don’t say it… if you continue to say it and not do it – then I don’t even listen to those words anymore 😮😮😮
To avoid that, one must actually “back it up” ✌️😘 … or don’t say lol
I just want sincere!
Anyway… he told me he would try today lol … I already knew he wouldn’t. I don’t say anything – but in my mind I just think “yeah ok whatever”… because I don’t see him. He says it – but he doesn’t have to. Wait until you can, before you say!!
The words are empty. I know he’s busy… I am fine with that – and I believe him – I know what his life is.
I still hold caution – slight caution.
I usually just say – “ok sounds good” lol
It’s not a huge deal… and whatever … but empty words bother me. Because for a lot of years I took empty words so… it’s just a thing. Careful there.
You may think that’s hard – but let me say this.. I put effort into people close in my life … so I will not give you empty words and I don’t really want to accept them – so that is why it bothers me for him to say and then not do. Don’t say, if you can not do. Sometimes that happens … I understand that… but don’t always say it and never do it – just wait!! Lol
I know he means well with his empty words lol ✌️❤️😘 …
I don’t think he looks at the words like I do? Lol
This is why I am careful with him… we are similar with things and understand each other’s things … BUT …
Hmm?? I do not know if we see or think same? I don’t know?
And then all of the sudden, he’s actually making effort with the communication 😮 … he’s “trying” 😮❤️
He is about hour away… but moving to further place – maybe 2 hours away? That won’t be for awhile though
But that’s also a thing.
I do believe him to be sincere with me… and probably even here with what he says…
I think he wants to… so he just says that… not really “thinking” lol …
It doesn’t really matter one way or the other but if keep saying and then don’t do … I stop listening 😮😮😮😱 is like boy who cried wolf ?? To my ears ? I hear that … but never happens so whatever ✌️😄
Loss of credibility with words ✌️😘 careful
Lol … he is free to do his thing – I know he is busy – he does not have to try to promise me anything – so… am just fine not seeing – of course I would love to see him, but I just know how busy I am… I know he busy too
I am just saying he doesn’t have to say that, for me to know he wants that. I know lol … he tells me a lot lol – I find a little humorous more and more lol
I just let him say it 😄😄… “I want to see you”
Ohhh that would be awesome
But I just know full well that it is not happening lol … and it’s funny because I know he is busy – I know what he does
When it’s meant to be… and it just all lines up ❤️ it be fine … he doesn’t have to say … I like his effort with the communication – that is effort also … I appreciate that ❤️ I like that a lot.
Anyway… one of these days he will show up and I’m going to be like 😱😱😱 lol
I am not totally huge on being caught off guard lol ✌️😘 he is the type that I could totally see surprising me or something lol – which for him is fine. He is not all flashy… he is understatedly awesome and unique – peacefully and quietly ❤️✌️ he has a peaceful aura too … his demeanor with me is so peaceful – I like that 😊
I don’t mind time – but I also work at a funeral home, AS WELL AS, survived covid lol ✌️ (so far) – so I don’t mind time… but I am also aware of it. ✌️
I just want things that are actually meant to be, so we see
I want to be very careful
Because I need to watch that with him for sure if he gonna turn it up 😮 careful 😮 … careful what you aim at lol 😘✌️
With distance and stuff – I never have to worry or really think about anything 😮
Is very easy 🙌 and also peaceful ❤️ lol …
I like him and could totally fall for him … I do feel a fire with him ❤️🔥 and oddly I do trust him 😮😮😮 …I know!! I must have gone insane 😮 lol… I’m kidding – he’s a good guy – you better believe I only let someone who is “good of heart”, near me this close 😮 so I do think that about him.
What if I did fall for him and then he is far – I can’t leave my area …So I really like him – but again … I’m all about what is meant to be so 🤷♀️
So I just be very cautious and careful
We see 😳😮
Just stop saying you gonna come see me, when you don’t lol … wait until it’s really actually possible …and THEN say that lol
Otherwise takes the meaning away – understand?? Then I don’t believe the words ✌️ careful with that
Suddenly, it feels like he more at ease with me than ever 😮
… careful with that too lol … I should have a caution ⚠️ sign lol … he will enter the danger zone… so he better know exactly what he wants if he gonna attempt! 😮
Yeah be careful 😳😮😮
Haha, you are in a thoughtful mood! Which is, of course, no bad thing and it is important to know your own mind and where those “lines in the sand’ are drawn.
You’ve already made the biggest leap in shifting him from seven years (!) in the Friends’ Zone haha and as you say, what will be, will be. Anyways, an hour is not so far away! 😉 Enjoy your day but get another steak ready – just in case!
LikeLiked by 2 people
I definitely know my limits and boundaries… absolutely know- what I am and am not ready for, or ok with …
Hahaha I am always thoughtful – but I am also silent sometimes 💋 sometimes I’m not ✌️
I am more at ease with him, because of the friendship …
…still cautious, because he seriously needs to keep his distance and words to self if not serious.
No lol … I suppose it is not far when “you” put it in context lol 😄😄 point taken
Hahaha ..no.. he won’t lol – and in little bit, I go do my errands lol
… you know that saying “you snooze – you lose, right?” I don’t wait on empty words lol 😘
You are funny lol – have extra steak ready 😄 That’s not happening… I already know lol … there is no just incase lol
But I am cool with that 😊✌️ cause still let’s me be safe 😉✌️- no sudden movements lol
I enjoy his convos – he is sweet. So I’m cool with that as is. I like him as a person so I allow it. ✌️
Enjoy your Sunday also 🙌
LikeLiked by 2 people
You are so welcome!! Haha, enjoy your day and good luck getting gas 😉
LikeLiked by 2 people
Ugh 🤦♀️ lol gas – well so far been ok at the woman one – I just change up all my times constantly ✌️😄 that way no one can pin point it and I only deal with women lol
And see… there is WAY BIG difference : knowing someone vs being hit on!!
When you know someone – you can understand what kind of person they are
But when you just get hit on … number one … it’s all the time… they fish 🎣… see what bites lol ✌️ – dime a dozen
I don’t trust them when they just do that. I notice that. I don’t want that.
I am skilled in avoidance 😘😄✌️ master level 💋😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
LikeLiked by 1 person
Off topic: thinking of you whilw watching Bernie for the 1st time ever. The character is an all-in-one employee of a small private funeral home in TX.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Lol – I will Google that! Hmm 🤔 curious ✌️