So wow 😮 lawyer actually went really good!! 😳😮
He was looking through my files and everything was all MY stuff only… he asked where is his questions, his financials etc
I said those 4 phone book size files, are all his motions while making me answer everything, he never answered or turned over anything, no protected me, he never turned in drug tests or coparenting things or financials
So lawyer asking for all those things including drug and alcohol tests … he said because it will pertain to the custody of my daughter we gonna ask for them ❤️❤️❤️❤️
They were court ordered before – I took mine – passed a 9 panel test… he never took one.
Also lawyer looked at his paystubs and past history of paying me…
He is currently behind on support… ALOT… both on child support and spousal, but he makes really good money, always has. So now we are going after attaching his pay directly from his employer.
He will now have to prove everything 😮
This is the first time a lawyer actually helped me ❤️ the first time I didn’t feel bullied ❤️ the first time I felt like he was working for me ❤️
He is sincere and helpful and he’s helping me ❤️ thats the first time I feel like a lawyer is trying to protect me ❤️
So yeah that went really well – I picked a good one ❤️
This one “I” picked!! ❤️ he’s amazing!!
And suddenly my whole life just blooms again!! ❤️ well until Satan comes back at me… but for now today went well ❤️
I do kinda fear that going after him will make him come at me even harder… so I worry a little … but I’m just going to put that aside for right now… because for the first time – I felt protected ❤️ I’m just gonna go with that for the moment.
I feel relief? A little bit? It’s usually me jumping through hoops and proving everything and answering everything – he has not answered one thing.
He does believe he is above the law… so we gonna see how this plays out – he’s dirty so I’m not totally comfortable … but this lawyer finally heard me ❤️ and finally looked at the files ❤️
That alone gives me a little peace ❤️ so yeah that went well today!!
All 4 of those phone book size files were just his motions and making me answer every single thing – which I did… I did backflips for the courts even while fighting breast cancer – until they made him stop.
Today was the first time anyone cared ❤️
So let’s see how he chooses to respond now.
Then after that… I went and picked up the groceries … came gone … made dinner – spent some time with my daughter
Also I showed the lawyer my daughters school photo from last year while I was in recovery from cancer … she was well taken care of, hair was done, nice dress, that was even before COVID … and I always made sure she was ok… I take good care of her – really good care of her
This year she was with him, her hair was a mess, unplanned outfit – you can see a drastic difference … it’s a severe difference
I am to keep a log of everything with her… if he doesn’t step up with her… we will go for custody. He doesn’t parent at all, only buys them.
So I have to start doing that, and providing communication for him to handle with her… we haven’t had communication in 4 years – it’s that bad
He crushed me while my dad was dying, and I lost my grandparents … and when my mom was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, and while I got diagnosed with cancer and fought that… he was brutal through that… and that’s not counting the marriage itself…
If he was that bad – right after I got out… imagine what that marriage was like!!! I can’t handle him… he is too brutal
We do not coparent together – I parent and he does nothing. I will attempt to coparent … I have done before but didn’t work and he came at me worse – so we see.
Oh yeah and lawyer wants me to set down a holiday plan… if I get for Christmas she is with me period … usually we share … if Christmas falls on my week… I share with him… she can go see him for a few hours – I never try to keep kids from him… but lawyer says is best down the line.
Anyway… so today went well, for the first time… but I don’t hold my breath. We see
I feel protected for the first time ever in all of this. ❤️
And speaking of which… this morning I saw an ad for a Netflix documentary about domestic violence … I don’t watch the news so I had not heard the story…
It was this one…
One sick MF… domestic violence is a huge issues that is ignored and not brought front and center – families are private and that is a hard thing to deal with – you have no idea unless you have been through it.
And that is why I am cautious… mine is also a chameleon… and I hid it. Their true colors come out eventually… I got out with my life
But that hit home – how they lie and look so calm doing it. I don’t have Netflix but I just saw that commercial this morning
So yeah – I’m cautious now ✌️
Good day though, finally went good. ❤️ we see ✌️
I work cleaning job tmrw and have Thursday off … Friday I work at funeral home. Daughter has Thursday and Friday off from school. We both get to sleep in Thursday!!!
Hopefully I can turn off the internal alarm for Thursday!! 🙏
Good night for now 💤❤️
I will read and respond mostly on Thursday ✌️ maybe every so often tmrw ??
I’m so glad!
Do not hesitate to get, and enforce, a restraining order if things get bad. It’s very easy!!
I hope all goes well and Satan realizes you have an equal, if not upper, hand.
Congrats on the good day and finally being HEARD and properly represented!!!!!
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Yes if it gets bad I am definitely doing that!!!
🙏 I just want fair
Thank you – I had great relief today ❤️❤️❤️
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I had gay friends who were roommates and simultaneously took out restraining orders on each other. Nightmare for them to work out (only the first one, which was the more legit one, was upheld) but funny for us outsiders to watch! (They had a verbal fight.. no physical harm ever occurred)
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Well I wanted a restraining order right from start… my first lawyer never did anything for me… filed nothing and responded to nothing – which was why I have been in this position to begin with – took money and did nothing.
He consistently was harassing and bullying me right from the start… and I was just a mom, I didn’t really understand or know how to do any of that stuff and he never let up – and then all my deaths happened and my cancer and he continued through all of that… so it was awful!
If I need one this time – I won’t hesitate to bring to the court immediately!
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Good!!
Sorry you’re having to learn the hard way but at least you’re learning… and will be able to help others!
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Thank you ❤️ yeah definitely been the hard way… I went to a place to help abused women get out and they said “oh over 20 year marriage – you be protected” 🤨 they were wrong – so yeah absolutely I can help others! And I plan to. ✌️❤️
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I’ve generally viewed my life, and esp this new experience of being broke, as gaining skills to help others!!
And I’m still trying to pay things forward. My food stamp allowance is more than I currently need so I used some of to to buy needed goods for a food bank.
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I do the exact same… ❤️
Everything in life is a lesson, and I am always helping others ❤️ I love doing that! I would rather do that than anything else
It can be a problem lol … cause I do prefer to help others and not “deal” with my own stuff… I am better helping others – I have been learning to help myself – which I don’t like very much … I am better taking care of others
Awww that is very sweet ❤️ I also pay forward for the kindness others have shown to me through things ❤️ people did really amazing things for me through everything ❤️ I will never ever forget that ❤️
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I’m the same. I’m having a very hard time accepting help now despite how much I need it.. and how much I provided help in the past. I can’t pay back so I’m doing what I can to pay forward, while learning how the system works for single people without kids.
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Oh yes I am same with that… I have a very difficult time accepting help myself … I have always only helped people… and I want to be strong … I don’t want to be at anyone’s mercy or pity etc … but during everything I was going through at one point – I had to accept help
Even from my kids!! I fought them on that cause I was the mom – I am supposed to take care of them!! Until my oldest said mum you have taken care of us our whole lives, now is our turn, please let us ❤️ that was hard and they made me cry
Sometime you just have to let people help – it’s very hard though – I have a very strong streak with trying to do myself especially after all this. But I do realize you need people sometimes – and there are sincere people who will help that have no other motive other than helping a fellow man
I watch sooooo many areas where our system is broken… my story… hearing yours … and I help alot of elderly people and also people who are sick (mainly with cancer) I see the elderly severely needing help and people just forget them… pay no mind. People who are sick, sometimes have no family or just need help through that … sometimes medically you are just a number- not a person
So anyway… system is broken definitely!! So much change is needed … we can’t even handle the homeless and that’s gonna get worse 😮
As for accepting help, its ok to need help… we all need help from to time, somehow. Sometimes we have no choice but to accept the help. So it’s ok. I just like to make sure if someone offers help they mean it just as that. Not for anything in return. Which is a reason why people are hesitant to accept help in first place, as well as their pride
We need an entire system overhaul!!! So broken!
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I’m so happy you’ve found a good lawyer to fight your corner Omatra! Wishing you well with your journey ahead 🙏
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Thank you so much ❤️ me too … and you can call me Trisha if want 😊
Everything finally looking up ❤️ changing… but doing good! 🙏
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I will – Beautiful name! So glad that everything is looking up for you Trisha 😊🙏
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Thank you ❤️
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What an encouraging day! Stay Strong and enjoy your long weekend!
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Yes very encouraging ❤️ I feel a little bit of relief
Thank you enjoy your weekend also ❤️✌️
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🙂
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